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by Rebecca Roache
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You know how, when teaching finishes for the summer, you feel all-powerful and end up vastly over-estimating how much you'll be able to get done before the new academic year? And, have you ever noticed that the opposite happens once term starts up again: you're overwhelmed, you panic because you don't think you're going to manage to do everything, but then you surprise yourself and it's all fine in the end? Yeah, well, there's a reason for that. Join your imperfectionist pal for a speculative...
Binary thinking is that horrible all-or-nothing approach that holds us back by convincing us that any positive change we consider will inevitably lead to disaster. You know the sort of thing: 'I should be more assertive, but if I try, I'll end up being an arrogant psychopath who everyone hates', or 'I should get out for a walk every day, but if I do, I will neglect all my duties and get fired', or 'If I show compassion towards myself I will give up and stop trying and never get anywhere in li...
We all know how hard you have to work to sit down and write. You'll do pretty much anything to avoid it. Have you ever noticed, though, that avoiding your writing is no less exhausting than just bloody doing it? Weird, right? Well, actually, not weird - at least, not when you understand how hard your poor, anxious brain is having to work to trick you into getting your words down. You care deeply about your writing - that's why you're so worried about getting it right. Yet, lots of the most we...
Are you frustrated with yourself because you just can't get on with the work you care most about? Do you find it easier to make progress with emails and marking than to get your writing done? Is your procrastination out of control? Are you just unbelievably lazy? Take a pause, my friend. There's a reason why you struggle to make progress on the important things, and it's not what you think. Tasks like writing are complicated, and require a ton of decision-making in order to make progress. Tha...
Is it bad to be called lazy? Prince Harry thinks so: in his memoir, he suggests that it's better to called racist than lazy. But even if you wouldn't go that far, I'm willing to bet that you care deeply about not being viewed as lazy. Perhaps you've worked when you should have taken a sick day, said yes to things that you knew were a bad idea, or pushed yourself to burnout - all to avoid the L word. If you've ever thought you might be lazy, you're in great company. Plenty of high achievers th...
Be honest. You're here because you think you completely suck at self-control, aren't you? You're constantly disappointing yourself, and it's getting you down. The people around you seem to be able to get on with things - but you find it impossible, for some reason. And, by 'for some reason', you mean 'because I'm a terrible person'. Help is at hand, my beautifully flawed friend. You've been hoodwinked about self-control. It's likely that you're actually much better at it than you think, and t...
You know what frailty is, and you definitely want to avoid it. But have you heard of emotional frailty? No, of course not - I've just made it up. But if you've ever felt like you're completely winning at life, and then some tiny little setback knocks you sideways, leaving you wondering what's wrong with you and why you suddenly can't cope, emotional frailty is to blame. Emotional frailty is invisible, it's dangerous - and often, the culture around us encourages us to do exactly the sorts of t...
You're a good person. You try to be a good friend, a good colleague, and a good neighbour. You care about other people, you pull your weight, and you don't let anyone down. But, sometimes, you feel you're not enough. You're exhausted, but taking time for yourself means doing wrong by somebody else. You feel like you need to destroy yourself just to avoid being a bad person. If this sounds familiar, you're not crazy or inadequate. The problem is that you've constructed a moral framework that u...
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The Academic Imperfectionist combines philosophical analysis and coaching insights to help you dump perfectionism and flourish on your own terms. Your host is Dr Rebecca Roache, a coach and Senior Lecturer in Philosophy at the University of London.
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