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Nope! We're Not Monogamous: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Ellecia Paine
Ellecia Paine is a non-monogamy relationship coach who helps people navigate ENM (Enthusiastic non-monogamy), polyamory, open relating, swinging, kink, tantra and life in general. Listen in to the candid conversations that give you a peek into the inner lives of other non-monogamous folks. Hear how they've overcome challenges like jealousy, insecurity, and social scrutiny. And celebrate with them as they share all the reasons it's worth it to have relationships that don't fit in the box.
Latest Episodes
The most recent episodes — sign up to get AI-powered summaries of each one.
- 1 weeks ago1h 15m
Rewind: Your Best Sex Isn't Behind You | Susan Bratton
Some conversations stay with you long after you hit stop recording. This is one of those conversations for me. I'm bringing back my interview with Susan Bratton, and I am not exaggerating when I say this is one of my favorite interviews I've ever done. Susan is a sex educator, author, and longtime consensually non-monogamous person who is incredibly passionate about helping people have more pleasure, better communication, and satisfying sex throughout their lives. And she has a LOT to say. We...
- 3 weeks ago1h 11m
Rewind: Jealousy, Compersion & the Messy Truth About Non-Monogamy with Dirty Lola
Some of my favorite conversations on this podcast are the ones where we stop trying to make non-monogamy look perfect and just talk about what it's actually like. This is absolutely one of those episodes. For this Rewind, I'm bringing back my conversation with sex educator Dirty Lola, and ohhhh, there is so much good stuff in this one. Lola takes us through her journey from experimenting with non-monogamy before she even had language for it, to marriage and monogamy, swinging, polyamory, divo...
- Aug 13, 20261h 4m
Rewind: How to Build Secure Polyamorous Relationships | Jessica Fern & David Cooley
Some conversations are just too good to stay buried in the archives. This week I'm bringing back one of my absolute favorite episodes with Jessica Fern, author of Polysecure, and David Cooley, co-author of Polywise. Even three years later, this conversation feels just as relevant, thoughtful, and practical as it did the first time we recorded it. If you've ever struggled with jealousy, conflict, emotional triggers, or wondered how to build relationships that actually grow stronger through har...
- Jul 30, 202658 min
Growing Up in a Polyamorous Family | A Conversation with Koe Creation
What is it actually like to grow up in a polyamorous family? There are plenty of opinions about how non-monogamy affects children, but very few of those opinions come from people who actually lived it. In this re-released episode of Nope, We're Not Monogamous, I sit down with educator, author, and activist Koe Creation, who grew up in a polyamorous family and now helps people navigate conversations around relationships, gender, sexuality, and chosen family. Together we explore what childhood ...
- Jul 16, 20261h 7m
Rewind: Wilder on Closed Triads, Poly Families & Living Authentically, EP. 161
Some conversations are simply too good to leave in the archives. This week I'm re-releasing one of my favorite early episodes with my dear friend, Wilder. Even years later, this conversation feels just as relevant. We dive into what it actually looks like to build a life outside of traditional relationship norms, from joining an already-married couple to creating a thriving polyamorous family together. Wilder shares her experience of living in a closed triad, navigating the assumptions people...
- Jul 2, 202646 min
What Nobody Teaches You About Polycule Dynamics with Red DeRooy and Stacey Smith?
Most conversations about non-monogamy focus on opening a relationship, navigating jealousy, or finding new partners. But what happens after that? How do you navigate a polycule where relationships are constantly evolving? How do you manage different expectations, conflicting needs, shifting priorities, and the very human reality that not everyone connects in the same way? In this episode of Nope! We're Not Monogamous, I'm joined by Red DeRooy and Stacey Smith?, co-authors of Nonmonogamy and G...
- Jun 18, 202633 min
The Courage to Show Up: Sex Positivity and Finding Your People with Jamie Love, EP. 159
What if the thing you're craving most isn't another dating app, another relationship book, or another set of rules? What if it's community? In this episode of Nope! We're Not Monogamous, Ellecia sits down with Jamie Love, Executive Director of Sex Positive World, to talk about the power of finding spaces where you can show up authentically, explore with curiosity, and realize you're not as alone as you thought. They dive into what sex positivity actually means beyond the stereotypes, why comm...
- Jun 4, 202629 min
Compersion Isn’t Mandatory, EP. 158
Do you ever feel like everyone else in polyamory got the compersion memo except you? Like you're supposed to be thrilled when your partner is excited about someone else... and if you're not, maybe you're doing non-monogamy wrong? In this episode of Nope! We’re Not Monogamous, we're talking about compersion, what it actually is, what it isn't, and why forcing yourself to feel it often creates more harm than healing. Because here's the truth: You don't have to be ecstatic. You don't have to pre...
About Nope! We're Not Monogamous
Ellecia Paine is a non-monogamy relationship coach who helps people navigate ENM (Enthusiastic non-monogamy), polyamory, open relating, swinging, kink, tantra and life in general. Listen in to the candid conversations that give you a peek into the inner lives of other non-monogamous folks. Hear how they've overcome challenges like jealousy, insecurity, and social scrutiny. And celebrate with them as they share all the reasons it's worth it to have relationships that don't fit in the box.
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