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by Rachel Elimelech
Qualified Solicitor | Higher Court Advocate | Story Listener | Emotional Mentor Rachel Elimelech is the warm, courageous voice behind Unspoken Emotions - a podcast that gives voice to the feelings we so often keep buried. A qualified Solicitor and Higher Court Advocate, Rachel combines professional insight with deeply personal lived experience - from surviving sexual abuse, loss, and single parenthood to rebuilding her life with quiet strength and unwavering resilience. Her journey from teenage single mum to respected legal professional has shaped her gift for deep connection. With empathy and authenticity, Rachel creates a safe, judgment-free space where guests are invited to speak the unspoken - grief, guilt, shame, anger, fear - and begin to let go of what no longer serves them. Through honest, unfiltered conversations, Unspoken Emotions explores how real people have turned pain into purpose and silence into healing. Rachel believes that healing begins the moment we speak the truth of our experiences - and that none of us should carry our emotions alone.
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Content note: this episode contains discussion of the death of a child, road death, grief, PTSD and the criminal justice system. Kaylan Hippsley was thirteen years old. He wanted to be a neurosurgeon. He played rugby and football. His mum Lisa had just passed her driving test and he told her she could teach him to drive someday. In February 2024 Kaylan was walking home in Hirwaun in South Wales when a car driven by Harley Whiteman hit him. Whiteman was drunk and on cocaine. He fled the scene. He then returned and attempted to pull the student nurse who was trying to save Kaylan away from him. Kaylan never regained consciousness. He died in hospital three days later. His family fought all the way to the Royal Court of Justice in London. The sentence was increased to nine years with a minimum of six in a secure prison. They held that knowledge. They built what they could of a life around it. Then they received a phone call. Harley Whiteman is already in an open prison. He could be released as early as 2028. Just four years after killing Kaylan. Before Kaylan would even have turned twenty. In this conversation Lisa talks about who Kaylan was. About the last video she has of him coming down the stairs in flippers and a snorkel the night before he was killed. About the machines being switched off at the exact time Kaylan was born. About the guilt she carries. And about the fight she refuses to stop. Kaylan would have been sixteen next month. Sign the Justice for Kaylan petition: https://c.org/2zDfrxJMYm Content note: this episode contains discussion of the death of a child, road death, grief, PTSD and the criminal justice system. HELPLINES | Include in everything UK | Samaritans: 116 123 | Free 24 hours UK | Cruse Bereavement Support: 0808 808 1677 | cruse.org.uk UK | Road Peace: roadpeace.org | 020 7733 1603 UK | Compassionate Friends (bereaved parents): tcf.org.uk | 0345 123 2304 UK | Child Bereavement UK: childbereavementuk.org | 0800 02 888 40 US | 988 Lifeline: call or text 988
Coercive control doesn't bruise. It doesn't photograph. It doesn't trigger emergency calls or leave marks on the world that the world can see. It operates through erosion. So gradual that the person living inside it often does not recognise what is happening until they have lost themselves entirely. Christine Dillard lived inside that erosion for seventeen years. She was a Fortune 500 director. A single mother of two. The woman everyone at work knew as strong, capable and unshakeable. Behind closed doors she was bracing every time she heard the garage door. She had forgotten her favourite dinner, her favourite film, her favourite colour. Her body was carrying the truth in inflammation, insomnia, a racing heart and high blood pressure, years before her mind was ready to hear it. She had no idea there had been four separate incidents in the car, not one. Her brain had protected her from remembering them all. This conversation is about what coercive control actually looks and feels like from the inside. About why staying made sense. About what it cost her to leave and what she found on the other side. And about her daughter who described her in one word two years after leaving. Tranquil. This episode was recorded earlier this year. I am re-releasing it today because some stories deserve more than one audience. And because somewhere someone is listening who needs to hear it for the very first time. Content note: this episode contains discussion of coercive control, domestic abuse and threats within a long-term relationship. HELPLINES | Include given content UK | National Domestic Abuse Helpline: 0808 2000 247 | nationaldahelpline.org.uk | Free, 24 hours UK | Women's Aid: 0808 2000 247 | womensaid.org.uk UK | Samaritans: 116 123 US | National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 | thehotline.org US | 988 Lifeline: call or text 988 KEY TAKEAWAYS Abuse Isn't Always Physical: Coercive control operates through the slow, subtle erosion of a person's identity and autonomy. It is often maintained through micro-moments and subtle manipulations rather than explosive, visible events. The Body Keeps the Score: Psychological and emotional abuse can manifest in severe physical symptoms. Christine experienced autoimmune issues, high blood pressure, racing heart rates, sweating, and chronic insomnia as a direct result of her environment. The Power of a "Tone": For victims of coercive control, a simple shift in their abuser's tone of voice can trigger a full-body trauma response. The body shuts down into a state of "fight, flight, or freeze," even if outsiders cannot perceive the threat. Strategic Exits are Crucial: Leaving a controlling relationship safely often requires careful, covert planning. Christine executed a three-year exit strategy to secure her finances, arrange housing, and ensure her children reached an age where custody dynamics would be safer. Trust Your Body's Signals: When your mind tries to gaslight you into believing "it's not that bad," your body will tell you the truth. Healing begins the moment you stop ignoring your own physical and emotional distress signals and seek confidential support. BEST MOMENTS "I didn't realize how much I had not even changed, I just was a shell of the person that I was 17 years, 18 years prior." "My brain was protecting me by not allowing me to remember all of those things... your body is protecting you. It’s allowing you to survive in the situation you’re in." "You hear a tone and you immediately shut down. Like your body doesn't know what to do. Your brain shuts off, your heart is racing... you don't know if you should stand still and not move, not breathe, or if you should run." "If any one of these physical symptoms hits you when he does something or he says something or uses a certain tone... your body is responding. It is that bad." "The time that I would have invested in him... I reinvested that time in myself and I was like, 'I'm going to be real selfish about this.'" HOW TO CONNECT WITH CHRISINE The Truth She Showed Me (memoir): [https://amzn.to/4t1LoR5] Instagram: [https://www.instagram.com/thetruthsheshowedme?igsh=Z3IxcWJlcmIyYm5t] TikTok: [https://www.tiktok.com/@thetruthsheshowedme?_r=1&_t=ZN-95xD2O4csXm] To connect with your host, follow Me HERE: Insta: https://www.instagram.com/rachel_unspokenemotions/ TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@rachel.unspoken.em Email: rachel@unspokenemotions.co.uk Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/rachel.elimelech To Buy Rachel a Coffee: https://buymeacoffee.com/unspokenemotions LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rachel-elimelech-a07
Celeste Warren spent nearly four decades in corporate global companies rising to Vice President and Chief Diversity and Inclusion Officer at a Fortune 100 company. She was the woman who walked into the most difficult rooms. The one who held space for conversations nobody else wanted to have. Who helped other people process their discomfort, navigate change and find common ground. From the outside she was the woman who had all the answers. What most people did not see was that she went home to an empty apartment, rocked in bed with her pillow, and cried alone. That the cost of always being the strong one was insomnia, stomach problems, nausea and a very specific kind of loneliness that came from never having anyone to pour into when the advice-giving was done. She told Rachel before they recorded: I've always been someone people came to for answers. What they didn't see was that I didn't always have a place to take my own questions. In this conversation Celeste and Rachel talk about what it costs to be the first. The only woman in the room. The one who had to work twice as hard to get half as far and then somehow also hold space for everyone else's discomfort. About the fishbowl feeling of making a mistake when everyone is watching. About what loneliness actually felt like in a body that was carrying too much. And about what it means to get up in your pyjamas at 9.30am and decide to go to the gym just because you want to. Celeste leads Celeste Warren Consulting and is the author of The Truth About Equity. Links to connect with Celeste:Website: www.CRWDiversity.comLink to book on Amazon: https://mybook.to/TruthAboutEquity LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/celestewarrenllc/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/crwdiversity YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@celestewarren-equity Substack: https://open.substack.com/pub/celestewarren Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/1CXPNHNqZE/?mibextid=wwXIfr
Adam McCormick has spent twenty-five years teaching other people to recognise the unfinished business of their childhoods. The patterns formed before we have words for them. The adaptations we built to survive. The emotions we buried so deeply they became normal. He did all of that while living his own unfinished business. For decades. Without fully seeing it. Adam grew up as what he calls his father's mini social worker. In a home shaped by alcoholism, he learned early that his job was to read his father's emotions, tend to his needs and disconnect entirely from his own. He became a superstar athlete to earn his father's attention. He drove a potato chip truck down a freeway at thirteen, in the dark, with no headlights, because he could not set a boundary with a drunk father behind the wheel. And then he built an entire career out of helping other people understand exactly what he had never quite applied to himself. In this conversation Adam and Rachel talk about what it costs to be the person everyone else comes to. About the addiction to keeping everything normal. About shame as a survival strategy that simply did not know when to stop. About what twenty-five years of teaching childhood trauma looks like when you finally recognise yourself in the material. And about the five-year-old in a karate uniform doing crane kicks in the front yard who became the compass for everything Adam now knows about getting back to himself. GUEST LINKS Adam is a Professor of Social Work at St. Edward's University and the author of Healing the Helping Professional: The Unfinished Business of Childhood Trauma, published by NASW Press.
Jo Kelly was going through cancer treatment. Alone in many of the ways that matter most. A single mum. One child with complex medical needs requiring regular hospital visits. She had just been through a separation. The word cancer was so heavy she would not use it. She called it booby chat. And then one morning, getting ready for radiation, she caught a glimpse of herself dancing naked in the mirror, half her hair gone, and she thought, this is interesting. She danced to the hospital. She danced in the hallways. She danced in front of the radiation machine while the nurses watched on the cameras and their faces lit up. And she felt, from the very first day, what she described as literal ecstasy. She did it for thirty days. It became a documentary. It became confirmation of the work she had always done. In this conversation Jo and Rachel talk about what it means to actually feel your emotions rather than manage them. About school training the movement and the instinct out of all of us from the start. About why you cannot pour from an empty cup when you have never even been allowed to feel it fill. About the daughter who heard the diagnosis and said can you warm up the pizza. About the son who said if anyone can do this it is you. And about Jo's answer to the unspoken emotion question. That it was all of it. All the spectrum. And that it is all love, even when it takes the face of rage. This is the most joyful and quietly revolutionary conversation I have had on this podcast. GUEST LINKS Instagram: @tobeornottoact_jokellyFacebook: @jo.kelly.77LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jokellyofficialYouTube: @JoKelly
Content note: this episode contains first-hand accounts of childhood physical, emotional and sexual abuse, and references to suicidal ideation. Cari Rickabough grew up in a family that looked perfect from the outside. She was taught the roles to play in public. Behind closed doors, it was a completely different story. Physical, emotional, and sexual abuse began before she had words for any of it. She forced herself to forget the earliest years, and would not remember them until she was in her forties. What she did carry consciously were thirty years of trauma that shaped everything. The relationships she could not keep. The jobs she could not hold. The college she could not finish. The identity she had never been allowed to form. Her body eventually said what she could not. Seizures that started at 20 and lasted twenty-two years, with no medical explanation anyone could find. Fibromyalgia that left her bedridden. Chronic fatigue. Major depressive disorder. Anxiety. A body holding what the mind had nowhere to put. She tried therapist after therapist. Every one told her the same thing. Twelve weeks. You will be good. She was not good. By her mid-forties she was twenty-four hours from ending her own life. Nobody knew. And then a friend, following a nudge he could not explain, made a phone call that changed everything. In this conversation, Cari talks about what it took to finally heal after thirty years, why NLP coaching reached something thirty years of therapy could not, what it felt like when the seizures stopped, and what she would say to the little girl who thought what was happening to her was normal. This episode is being re-released today because some stories deserve more than one audience. And because somewhere someone is listening who needs to hear it for the very first time. Content note: this episode contains first-hand accounts of childhood physical, emotional and sexual abuse, and references to suicidal ideation. To connect with Cari: Linktree: https://linktr.ee/resiliencemindandbodycoaching
You would never let your car run out of fuel and expect it to keep going. You would never skip the service for three years and then wonder why the engine is making that noise. And yet most of us do exactly that to ourselves. We run on empty. We ignore the warning lights. We keep going until we are snapping at the people we love, crying in the supermarket over nothing and wondering when we became this person. In this solo episode, Rachel talks about why high-functioning women consistently put themselves last, how to spot the signs that you are closer to burnout than you think, and what an actual reset looks like inside a real life rather than a fantasy one. She also introduces Beneath the Brave, a free three-minute quiz that names the specific pattern keeping you stuck. No credit card, no catch. Just something that might genuinely change the way you understand yourself. Links mentioned: Beneath the Brave quiz: brave.unspokenemotions.co.uk | Free | 3 minutes
Content Warning This episode contains first-hand accounts of childhood physical and sexual abuse, family estrangement and difficult periods of mental health. If any of these topics may affect you, please take care of yourself while listening. You can pause, skip or come back to this when you feel ready. You are not alone. Samaritans: 116 123 NAPAC: 0808 801 0331 Rape Crisis: 0808 500 2222 Holly Fowles-Pazdro grew up not feeling safe, not feeling seen and not feeling allowed to say so. She spent her teens escaping into drugs and parties because that was easier than going home. She spent fifteen years in film and TV doing hair and makeup, working eighteen-hour days, going to the toilet to cry and coming back out smiling. Until the day her back collapsed on set and she could not get up. What followed was an eleven-hour surgery, months alone with a litter grabber, a wean off opioids, and the beginning of one of the most profound personal rebuilds I have ever witnessed. During EMDR therapy, Holly began to remember things her brain had locked away to protect her for decades. Things she had no conscious memory of. And she had to face them. Alone. In the dark. Every day. She has never spoken about any of this publicly. Until now. In this conversation Holly talks about what it means to grow up as the black sheep. About finding a diary at 41 that told her things she had forgotten at 10. About the eleven-hour surgery that forced her to stop and in stopping, find out who she actually was. About cutting off her family and watching abundance flood in. About the poem she wrote when words were the only thing left. And about the insight her therapist says changed everything: it is not about letting go. It is about whether you have the capacity to hold space for all of it. Holly is now a mind, body and facial specialist focused on nervous system-led treatments. She holds space for others as someone who has had to hold space for everything herself. Content note: this episode contains discussion of childhood physical and sexual abuse, family estrangement, chronic pain, addiction and dark moments during recovery. Please take care of yourself while listening. Can you also add in her socials in Connect with Guest section. Holly's Instagram: @mindfulglow_withholly Holly's TikTok: @mindfulglow_withholly Holly's website: www.mindfulglowwithholly.com
Qualified Solicitor | Higher Court Advocate | Story Listener | Emotional Mentor Rachel Elimelech is the warm, courageous voice behind Unspoken Emotions - a podcast that gives voice to the feelings we so often keep buried. A qualified Solicitor and Higher Court Advocate, Rachel combines professional insight with deeply personal lived experience - from surviving sexual abuse, loss, and single parenthood to rebuilding her life with quiet strength and unwavering resilience. Her journey from teenage single mum to respected legal professional has shaped her gift for deep connection. With empathy and authenticity, Rachel creates a safe, judgment-free space where guests are invited to speak the unspoken - grief, guilt, shame, anger, fear - and begin to let go of what no longer serves them. Through honest, unfiltered conversations, Unspoken Emotions explores how real people have turned pain into purpose and silence into healing. Rachel believes that healing begins the moment we speak the truth of our experiences - and that none of us should carry our emotions alone.
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