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Who We Are with Rachel Lim: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Rachel Lim
Who we are is an ever-evolving journey without limits. Join the ever-curious Rachel Lim as she delves into every facet of our lives — from work and family to relationships, self-discovery, and beyond. Experience a series of conversations and shared reflections that span from in-depth discussions with thought leaders around the world, to personal lessons shared with friends. Each episode offers valuable insights into our identities and pathways to self-improvement. Welcome to Who We Are — a podcast devoted to the continuous journey of uncovering our ever-evolving selves.
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- 6 days ago43 min
Raising Conscious Humans: Raising the Child You Have, Not the Child You Want
Hwee Keng said: “There is a personality in that small human being... you don’t know the settings. First, I think you need to find out the settings.” As parents, we spend so much energy shaping who we hope our children will become, and perhaps not enough time discovering who they already are. What struck me about Hwee Keng is how much of her parenting has been about unlearning her own expectations. She even caught herself once after feeling disappointed that Max didn’t win a competition, and realised some of that disappointment was about her own ego. That hit me. Because maybe the work is not raising the child we imagined, but learning to really see the child in front of us. In this episode, we talk about curiosity over performance, giving children real agency, the difference between “you’ve got this” and “we’ve got you,” responsibility, consequences, and what it means to raise children who are truly fit for life. Follow CLOSER on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/closerwithrach/ Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/
- Aug 11, 202647 min
#60: SG's Fastest Woman on What Success Never Taught Her
Before Shanti Pereira became Singapore's fastest woman, before she made history on some of the world's biggest stages, she was a ten-year-old girl who lost a few races in primary school and wanted to quit. That's where we begin. Not with the medals, but with the moments most people never see. Losing both her scholarships within the same week at 22 and sharing, "It really felt like rejection." Getting injured in an Olympic year after achieving her dream of qualifying for Paris on merit, and wondering if she'd even make it to the start line. The unglamorous discipline of showing up on the days she didn't feel like it at all. What struck me most wasn't Shanti's list of achievements.. it was the way she spoke about identity. About learning not to tie her self-worth to success or failure. About protecting her peace. And about choosing, again and again, not to give up when things get hard. At the end of every season, whether it's been a good one or a difficult one, she asks herself: "Did I show up?" I think that's a question all of us need from time to time. I hope you'll enjoy this conversation with Shanti Pereira. Chapters 00:00:00 Meet Shanti Pereira: The Woman Behind Singapore’s Fastest Sprint 00:01:20 Growing Up in the Shadow of Track and Field 00:03:46 The Childhood Lesson That Changed Everything 00:05:27 Grounded Advice For Her Younger Self 00:06:54 Facing Rejection: Losing Two Scholarships in a Single Week 00:09:14 Defying Failure and Choosing Resilience 00:12:40 Managing Olympic Dreams Amidst Physical Injuries 00:18:09 Staying Grounded: Body Care, Aging, and Reconnecting With Her "Why" 00:20:23 Choosing Stillness Over Chaos at the Starting Line 00:25:12 Tuning Out Public Pressure to Protect Your Joy 00:27:56 How to Reset Your Mindset After a Bad Race 00:30:48 The Powerful Advice That Stayed With Her 00:31:33 Finding Her Identity Beyond Winning and Losing 00:34:23 The Unseen Work and Human Side of Elite Performance 00:36:17 Choosing Consistency and Building Unshakable Habits 00:37:36 Shanti Pereira’s Definition of a Champion 00:39:19 Inspiring the Next Generation of Athletes 00:40:13 Sacrificing Her 20s: Choosing a Different Path Without Regret 00:41:23 Entering a Milestone Decade and Looking Toward Her Next Era 00:43:35 Shanti Pereira’s Recovery Rituals and Wellness Staples 00:45:18 The Message She Hopes to Leave Behind 00:46:05 Staying True to Herself Beyond the Spotlight 00:46:41 Final Reflections Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow Shanti Pereira here: https://www.instagram.com/vshantipereira/
- Jul 22, 202659 min
#59: What Success Never Prepared Me For with Ingck
Most people know Ing as the founder of INGU - the skincare brand that sold out 30,000 units in three minutes with zero advertising. The trusted voice who built a community of millions by doing the one thing his industry often punishes: telling the truth. But this conversation isn't really about skincare.. it's about what happens after you build something people believe in. The weight of carrying other people's trust. The loneliness of being misunderstood. The panic attacks that made him think he was dying. The goodbye video he filmed, edited, and still hasn't had the courage to post. For the first time, Ing shares what was happening behind the scenes during one of the biggest seasons of his life, and how it changed the way he thinks about ambition, happiness and success itself. We also talk about the person who answered the phone from a surgery room when Ing thought he was going to die on the floor of a café, and why that relationship ultimately reshaped his definition of what really matters. I left this conversation seeing success a little differently. I hope you do too. Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow Ing here: https://www.instagram.com/ingck/ Follow Ingu Skin here: https://www.instagram.com/inguskin/
- Jul 1, 202623 min
#58: What If Your Next Chapter Is Bigger Than You've Imagined?
You don't need a crisis to enter a new chapter. Sometimes life is moving along just fine. And yet, you find yourself carrying questions you can't quite shake. This conversation feels especially meaningful to me. Three years ago, Bill Burnett helped shape one of the biggest chapters of my life. Today, I'm returning to his work because the questions I'm asking have changed, and I need that space again. Together, we explore why so many of us feel there's "something more," why life was never meant to be a straight line, and how creating the time, space, and structure to think differently can help us navigate what's next with greater clarity, intention, and possibility. If this conversation resonates with you, Bill and I will be hosting a special CLOSER experience in Singapore on 25th July. We'd love for you to join us as we explore what your next chapter could become. Sing up for CLOSER x Bill Burnett here: https://tinyurl.com/5n7dkdrb Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Visit Bill Burnett’s website here: https://designingyour.life/ Read ‘Designing Your Life’ here: https://designingyour.life/books-designing-life-original-book/
- Jun 16, 202643 min
#57: What 'Kiasu' Culture Is Really Costing Us with Teo You Yenn
Most of us have been taught that the pressure Singaporean parents feel is a mindset problem. That we just need to relax. Stop being so kiasu. The data tells a completely different story. Associate Professor Teo You Yenn spent three years interviewing 92 Singaporean parents across every class background for her new book Unease; and what she found will reframe how you see your own life. Not just parenting. The whole thing. She makes the case that the exhaustion, the anxiety, the feeling that you're doing everything right and still something is off.. none of it is personal. It's structural. And until we understand that distinction, nothing changes. We talked about: Why "kiasu" is not a cultural trait; and what it actually is What it means that most parents describe their child as a problem to solve Why Singapore's falling birth rate isn't a fertility problem - it's a conditions-for-family-life problem The three quiet costs to our society that nobody is talking about What the opposite of unease actually is (it's not ease) What stayed with me long after we stopped recording: the way we're living is shaping who we're becoming. As individuals, as parents, as a society. And we haven't stopped to ask if this is who we want to be. Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:36 Meet You Yenn: Exposing the Contradiction of Singaporean Success 00:04:02 Defining “Unease”: The Quiet Struggle of Helplessness in Singapore 00:05:45 Why “Kiasu Mentality” is Too Simple an Excuse 00:07:33 How the System Conditions Singaporeans to Run the Race 00:10:48 The Painful Cost of Losing Agency 00:12:00 Returning to the Original Dream of Prosperity in Singapore 00:14:30 Seeing Our Children Through the Lens of Problems 00:16:49 Reevaluating Our Values Across Class Lines 00:20:48 The Unequal Weight of Motherhood 00:23:42 What Does a “Pro-Family” Society Look Like? 00:25:43 Singapore’s Low TFR: A Fertility Problem or a Family Life Problem? 00:28:01 Singapore’s Obsession with Finding “Top Talents” 00:32:29 Shifting the Narrow Definition of “Family” in Singapore 00:34:17 Writing for a Historian 50 Years from Now 00:36:10 Finding Hope in a Shared Public Resonance 00:39:15 Final Reflections Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow You Yenn’s updates here: https://www.instagram.com/ethosbooks/ Purchase ‘Unease: Life in Singapore Families’ here: https://www.ethosbooks.com.sg/products/unease-life-in-singapore-families Write in to the team at hello@rachreflects.com
- May 19, 202649 min
#56: Minister Indranee Rajah: What Does It Take to Want a Future in Singapore?
Singapore's total fertility rate has hit a historic low. But this conversation was never really about birth rates. It was about what modern life actually feels like for many Singaporeans today. The pressure. The exhaustion. The invisible weight of always having to keep up. And the quiet calculation so many people are running; about whether building a family here is something they can imagine, afford, or want. Minister Indranee Rajah leads Singapore's Marriage and Parenthood Reset. She is also single. And she has no children of her own. In this conversation, we go beyond policy. We talk about: - The invisible mental load women carry that no support system fully removes - The pressure parents feel before a child is even born - and why it starts earlier than most people realise - The women who have built lives they genuinely love - and aren't sure they want to give that up - What the public reaction to the word "detour" was really saying - What it means to lead this conversation as a single woman without children - The family she lost - and why their absence shaped her understanding of family itself - Whether modern Singaporean life still feels emotionally sustainable enough to build a family within Chapters 00:00:00 Minister Indranee Rajah: The Minister Tasked With Singapore’s Future 00:02:50 Growing Up Between Two Cultures & Faiths 00:05:59 Her Mother's Greatest Gift 00:06:57 How Her Legal Mindset Shapes Singapore’s Toughest Conversation 00:10:21 Why Singaporeans Are Rejecting the Life Script — Not Family 00:14:36 The Overachievement Culture That Made Good Enough Feel Like Failure 00:17:14 The Growing Pressure of Raising Kids in Singapore 00:21:08 The Invisible Mental Load Women Carry 00:22:31 The Woman Who Hid Her Fertility Treatment From Her Boss 00:23:37 Addressing Singaporean Work Culture & Fertility Stigma 00:29:56 Why Singaporeans Are Choosing Their Quality of Life Over Parenthood 00:32:07 The “Detour” Comment That Sparked Debate 00:35:37 Leading Singapore’s Parenthood Conversation as a Single Woman 00:38:10 Why Baby Bonuses Don’t Apply to Unwed Mothers 00:41:43 Why She's Doing This — Even When Everyone Says It's Impossible 00:44:47 What Makes Her Believe Singapore Can Change Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow Minister Indranee here: https://www.instagram.com/indraneerajah/ Download the FSS fertility workplace support guide here: https://fertilitysupport.sg/wp-content/uploads/2025/07/FSS-workplace-support-guide.pdf Write in to the team at hello@rachreflects.com.
- May 12, 202627 min
#55: The Fertility Convo That's Long Overdue ft. Margaret Wang
Most of us only start thinking about fertility when something suddenly feels urgent; a doctor’s appointment, a breakup, a birthday, or the quiet realisation that time may not feel as endless as we once thought. In this episode, I sit down with Margaret Wang, CEO of GenPrime and Rhea Fertility, for a deeply honest conversation about fertility, womanhood, pressure, timing, and learning to listen to our bodies before life forces us to. Together, we talk about: why fertility shouldn’t just be a “women’s issue” the invisible emotional load many women quietly carry egg freezing, aging, and the pressure surrounding motherhood and timelines the questions many of us don’t even know to ask about our own bodies and why so many women still feel alone in this conversation Margaret also opens up personally about navigating egg freezing, heartbreak, societal expectations, and the tension between building a career, building a company, and hoping to one day build a family. Whether fertility feels far away, deeply present, or painfully emotional for you right now, this conversation is an invitation to get curious, ask earlier questions, and feel a little less alone. Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:09 Get to Know Margaret Wang: The Woman Reshaping Fertility Care Across Asia 00:04:18 A Holistic Approach to Redefining Fertility Stigma 00:06:12 Egg Freezing: Progress, Freedom and the Gaps We Don’t Talk About 00:08:52 Why Fertility Conversations Still Feel Taboo 00:13:22 Nobody Taught Us How Fertility Actually Works 00:15:51 How to Ask the Right Questions About Fertility 00:19:01 Numerical Age vs Biological Age: Is It Too Late? 00:21:08 Debunking Fertility Myths and Misconceptions 00:23:20 The Personal Cost of Working in Fertility Care 00:25:53 Margaret Wang’s Message to the World 00:27:07 Final Reflections Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Connect with Margaret here: https://sg.linkedin.com/in/margaretmwang Find out more about Rhea Fertility here: https://www.rheafertility.com/ Write in to the team at hello@rachreflects.com.
- Apr 28, 20261h 2m
#54: Nathania Ong: First Singaporean to Lead the West End, And She Almost Gave Up
Nathania Ong is the first Singaporean to lead both Les Misérables and Hamilton on London’s West End. But before any of that, she was 18, alone in a foreign city, rejected by every drama school she applied to in a single week. This is a story about the years nobody sees.. the flight home after every door closes, and the quiet season where you have to decide: Do I keep going, or do I let this go? In this conversation, Nathania opens up about: the rejections that almost broke her the stage fright she developed after going viral the best friend who talked her back from the edge and the philosophy that has carried her through every closed door since “Sometimes it’s not no. Sometimes it’s not yet. And what is for you will not pass you by.” Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:29 Meet Nathania Ong: From Singapore to the West End 00:02:35 Growing Up in a House Full of Voices 00:07:11 The First Win That Changed Everything 00:10:00 Losing Singing — and Finding Herself Again 00:13:57 Five Rejections in One Week 00:18:00 “I Almost Gave Up” 00:19:47 The Second Chance She Almost Didn’t Take 00:25:55 Her Greatest Triumph Wasn’t Success 00:28:10 What Keeps You Going When Nothing Does 00:29:18 Why Rejection Feels So Personal 00:32:22 Becoming Éponine — And Redefining the Role 00:37:00 When Success Brings Fear 00:38:28 Stage Fright, Anxiety, and Finding Ground Again 00:41:04 Pre-Show Rituals & Becoming the Character 00:42:04 Creating Something Honest for Herself 00:43:33 What She’d Tell Her Younger Self 00:45:11 Advice for Anyone Chasing a Dream 00:45:38 Final Reflections Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow Nathania Ong here: https://www.instagram.com/nattyong/ Write in to the team at hello@rachreflects.com.
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About Who We Are with Rachel Lim
Who we are is an ever-evolving journey without limits. Join the ever-curious Rachel Lim as she delves into every facet of our lives — from work and family to relationships, self-discovery, and beyond. Experience a series of conversations and shared reflections that span from in-depth discussions with thought leaders around the world, to personal lessons shared with friends. Each episode offers valuable insights into our identities and pathways to self-improvement. Welcome to Who We Are — a podcast devoted to the continuous journey of uncovering our ever-evolving selves.
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