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by Susan Guthrie
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Do you know what almost no one tells you when you are creating a parenting plan? Some of the biggest co-parenting battles after divorce will not be over the things you think. It may not be the major custody decision or where the children will primarily live. It may be the late pickup, the unanswered text, the forgotten backpack, or the soccer registration deadline no one thought to clarify. That is why Susan Guthrie is joined by Gabrielle Hartley, attorney, mediator, parenting conflict expert, TEDx speaker, bestselling author of Better Apart: The Radically Positive Way to Separate, and creator of Mediator Gabby. Gabrielle has spent decades helping families navigate separation with greater clarity, less conflict, and better outcomes for children. Together, they get practical about why so many parenting plans break down after the divorce is finalized and what it actually takes to build one that holds up in real life. This conversation is for anyone creating a parenting plan, already co-parenting, or supporting someone who is. Because choosing what feels easier right now has a way of creating a much more difficult problem to solve later. Covered in this episode: Why most co-parenting conflict has nothing to do with bad parenting What makes a parenting plan fall apart once real life takes over How the "easier now, harder later" trap quietly sets families up for more conflict Why clarity matters more than detail when building a durable parenting plan How Mediator Gabby helps parents arrive prepared, stay focused, and reach better agreements WHAT IF AN AI MEDIATOR COULD HELP YOU BUILD A PARENTING PLAN BEFORE YOU EVER WALK INTO A ROOM? There are approximately 29-million children living in single-parent families in the United States, and the vast majority of their parents never have access to a lawyer, a mediator, or any professional guidance at all. Mediator Gabby, Gabrielle's AI-supported parenting plan tool was built with those families in mind. Using this custom AI tool, each parent completes a guided onboarding on their own before any joint conversation begins, working through the full landscape of a parenting plan so that by the time they sit down together, they already know where they agree, where they do not, and what needs to be worked through. Here is what that preparation can do for families: Save three to five hours of introductory conversation before mediation even begins Help parents arrive focused and prepared rather than reactive and overwhelmed Surface the details most people do not think to address until they become conflict points Lower the emotional temperature in the room so real resolution can happen faster Keep the process moving forward instead of stalling on issues that feel impossible in the moment A parenting plan is the operating system for your family's next chapter. The clearer and more intentional it is from the start, the less conflict it creates down the road, and the better the experience for your children. FREE DOWNLOAD: Parenting Plan Reality Check: The Questions Every Co-Parent Needs to Answer Before Finalizing a Parenting Plan + Companion Article Find the article and free download on the website at https://divorceandbeyondpod.com/latest-episode Referenced Episodes from the Archive: The 7 Most-Asked Divorce Questions on ChatGPT, Answered by a Top Family Law Attorney with Susan Guthrie Discovery Demystified: Why Fact-Finding is the Most Important Step in Your Divorce with Susan Guthrie Conflict Resolution Made Easy: Managaing the Five Destructive Behaviors We All Have with Gabrielle Hartley Gabrielle Hartley Has the Secret to Helping Us All Get Along Better and It Starts with Y.E.S. <a href='https://divorceandbeyond.podbean.com/e/is-your-divorce-taking-too-long-blitz-it-and-be-done-with-gabrielle-hartley-on-the-d
One of the biggest fears people face when contemplating divorce is the financial unknown. If you are sitting out there right now feeling overwhelmed, unsure where to begin, or worried about money, this conversation was made for you. This week Susan is bringing you one of the most listened to and most shared episodes from the Divorce and Beyond archive, a conversation with certified divorce financial analyst Hollis Hardiman, also a certified mediator and certified collaborative professional, walking through the foundational financial preparation that can make such a difference when first starting the divorce process. Together, Susan and Hollis get into what it really takes to protect your finances as you enter the process, from building the right professional support team to understanding what your household actually costs to approaching the big decisions, like the house, with clarity and an open mind instead of fear. Covered in this episode: Why money is the number one fear people face when contemplating divorce and why the right professional support team changes everything How to start building a picture of your finances from what you already have access to, even if your spouse handled the money Why alimony and support are temporary and what it means to plan now for when they end How a CDFA helps clients protect their finances not just during the divorce process but for their financial future as well HOW TO HANDLE THE MOST COMMON QUESTION ASKED DURING DIVORCE, "CAN I KEEP THE HOUSE?" Almost everyone walks into the divorce process asking the same thing: can I keep the house? It is an understandable instinct. But when keeping the house becomes a fixed position rather than one option among many, it can stall the process, drain resources, and leave you worse off financially in the long run. Some things to consider, as discussed in this episode include: One household income divided into two households means the math will not work the same way Understand what it would actually cost to keep the house: refinancing, mortgage qualification, maintenance, and carrying costs Explore all the options: keeping, selling, renting, downsizing You can put the puzzle together a lot of different ways in divorce, but only if you stay open to looking at all the pieces The goal is not to win the house. The goal is to make the decision that sets you up for the strongest financial future. Get the answers, both good and bad, and then decide. Referenced Episodes from the Archive: How to Get Your Act Together So that You Can Tackle Your Divorce with Alex Beattie of Divide & Thrive The Solution for Tackling the Divorce Detour with Storey Jones, Creator of dtour.life It’s All About the House: What You Need to Think About Before You Decide to Keep It with Tami Wollensak ______________________________________________________________________ This Week’s Guest: Hollis Hardiman, CDFA Hollis provides financial, retirement, and wealth management services to her clients. She specializes in helping people navigate major life transitions including divorce, the loss of a spouse, and preparing for retirement.
Most people who go through divorce will tell you the same thing: "I was blindsided." But were they really? Or were the signs there all along, just not recognized for what they were? That is the question at the center of this conversation, and Susan Guthrie is bringing in one of the true icons of family law to answer it. Marilyn Chinitz, partner at Blank Rome and renowned matrimonial attorney with more than four decades of experience, has sat across from thousands of clients who never saw it coming. She knows the red flags. She knows the financial blind spots. And she does not mince words. Right now, a memoir is taking over the national conversation. Strangers: A Memoir of Marriage by Belle Burden has ignited a bellwether of attention. This book has people everywhere asking, "How did she not see it?" Susan and Marilyn use this moment as a launching pad to go somewhere deeper: the patterns, the red flags, and the financial realities that every person in a marriage or contemplating one needs to understand. Covered in this episode: The red flags hiding in plain sight, including subtle communication patterns, financial avoidance, and how your spouse treats others A client story that shows exactly how a prenup gives you a heads up about who you are marrying How trusts work in a marriage, why they are often set up completely legitimately, and when they cross into "funny business" that courts will not tolerate Why you do not divorce the same person you married, and what that really means for how you need to prepare THIS CONVERSATION ALSO DIGS INTO WHY BEING AN EQUAL PARTNER MEANS BEING AN INFORMED ONE Assets could be held in a trust you did not know about. The home could be rented. The wealth could be encumbered by debt. And if you never asked, you may not find out until you are sitting across from a divorce attorney. Ask to sit down and go through the finances together, even once a year Review bank statements, tax returns, and credit card accounts Understand what is in your name, what is joint, and what is held in a trust If your spouse brushes you off or refuses, that is a red flag worth taking seriously Get professionals around you: a financial advisor, a forensic accountant, and an attorney, even before anything goes wrong This is not about suspicion. It is about being an equal partner and an informed one. The time to understand what you have is during a happy, intact marriage, not across a conference table from a divorce attorney. You are better off having that conversation early. FREE DOWNLOAD: The Red Flags You Didn’t See Checklist + Companion Article Susan has created two resources to help you move from hearing this to actually using it.The Red Flags You Didn't See Checklist walks you through the patterns discussed in this episode and gives you a way to reflect more intentionally on your own situation. The companion article goes deeper into the topic, drawing from this broader conversation and what is playing out in real life right now. Both are available at divorceandbeyondpod.com. If this episode helped you, please share it and leave a review. It genuinely helps the show reach the people who need it most. Books Referenced: Strangers: A Memoir of Marriage, Belle Burden _______________________________________________________________ This Week’s Guest: Marilyn Chinitz Marilyn Chinitz is a Partner at Blank Rome with 40 years of experience in every facet of family law. She is known for representing A-list celebrities and influential, high-profile clients in cases that have received national and international attention. https://www.blankrome.com/people/marilyn-b-chinitz#biography https://www.linkedin.com/in/marilyn-chi
Over the past couple of weeks, headlines have described a tragic murder suicide involving a couple going through a divorce, once again framing it as a "contentious divorce." Let's be very clear about something: divorce did not cause what happened. Divorce does not cause murder. Domestic violence causes murder. That is why Susan Guthrie is doing this difficult but important solo episode. She walks through the patterns of abuse, the high risk indicators that change a situation entirely, why the moment of separation is so dangerous, and what a thoughtful, strategic exit actually looks like. This conversation moves from awareness to action, so if any part of what you hear feels familiar, you have something calm and structured to carry with you as you think through your next steps. Covered in this episode: Why the moment of separation is often the most dangerous time, and how understanding that allows you to move more thoughtfully and strategically. The high risk indicators to take seriously: strangulation, threats to kill, access to firearms, stalking, extreme jealousy or control, and statements like "if I can't have you, no one will." What a thoughtful, strategic exit actually looks like, from quiet planning and digital safety to building a small, trusted circle of support. Why your children and pets must be part of your safety plan from the very beginning. ⚠️ IMPORTANT: ACCESS TO A FIREARM SIGNIFICANTLY INCREASES YOUR RISK If there is access to a firearm and you are leaving, you have to take that seriously. It significantly increases risk. This is where having professional guidance before you leave, and as you are making your plan, becomes critical. Find a domestic violence advocate Find a divorce coach who specializes in helping people experiencing domestic abuse or violence Meet with an attorney who understands the risks Include your children and your pets in your safety plan from the beginning Do not announce your plan before you are ready, as that can increase your risk This is not a time for informal arrangements. The structure of your plan will matter, and getting guidance early on and plotting your strategy so that it is fully developed can make a meaningful difference. FREE DOWNLOAD: Your Safety First, A Practical Exit and Protection Plan for High-Risk Relationships Susan created a companion guide to go along with this episode. In a moment like this, you should not have to remember everything you are hearing on a podcast episode. This is a calm, structured, step-by-step resource to help you think through your situation and your next steps. Find it here. If this episode helped you, please share it and leave a review. It genuinely helps the show reach the people who need it most. Referenced Episodes from the Archive Everything You Need to Know to Get a Restraining Order with Attorney Uswah Khan Empowered Advocacy: Effectively Sharing Your Abuse Story and Achieving Justice with Beverly Price Walking on Eggshells in Family Court: Meet Aimee Says, the AI Tool Transforming Survivor Support with Anne Wintemute _____________________________________ Aimee Says: Support for Survivors Creating a Safety Plan Aimee Says is a private, AI-powered tool designed to support survivors navigating post-separation abuse by helping you document experiences, identify patterns of coercive control, and organize your story with greater clarity. This can be especially valuable when creating a safety plan, preparing to communicate with professionals, or navigating the legal system. It is a supportive tool, not a substitute for professional help, and if you are in immediate danger, please contact a domestic violence hotline or local resource. Learn more here: <a href='https://www.aimeesays.com/en/home
You have probably done it. Typed a question about your divorce into ChatGPT or another AI tool late at night, when you did not want to call anyone else. You are not alone. In this solo episode, family law attorney and mediator Susan Guthrie answers the 7 most common divorce questions people are asking AI, with the depth and 35-plus years of experience that make the difference between a good-enough answer and the right one. The 7 questions covered: What are the most common mistakes people make during divorce? How can I find the right resources and support to help me through divorce? What are the best ways to communicate with my ex-spouse? What are effective strategies for co-parenting after divorce? How can I use divorce as an opportunity for growth and transformation? How do I protect my financial future during and after divorce? What should I know about the legal process my attorney might not tell me? Susan also covers how to use AI smartly during your divorce, including three legal risks every person in an active proceeding should understand before typing private details into a commercial AI. IMPORTANT: A LEGAL CAUTION ABOUT USING AI IN YOUR DIVORCE This episode covers what AI gets right and wrong about divorce. It also addresses something rarely discussed in public: the legal risks of using commercial AI tools like ChatGPT or Gemini while going through a divorce proceeding. Do not enter private financial details, asset information, or custody specifics into commercial AI platforms Case law is still developing, but courts have already ruled that AI conversations can be subject to discovery in legal proceedings Entering attorney-client privileged communications, therapist notes, doctor-patient information, or financial professional advice into a commercial AI may waive those legal privileges permanently Use AI to understand general concepts. Keep the specific details of your situation in privileged, protected spaces: your attorney's office, your therapist's room, your mediator's table. FREE DOWNLOAD: The Divorce Questions Everyone Is Asking AI, a companion guide with key takeaways and resources. Find it here If this episode helped you, please share it and leave a review. It genuinely helps the show reach the people who need it most. _______________________________________________________________________ This Week's Sponsor: Hello Divorce Hello Divorce is a modern platform designed to support people before, during, and beyond divorce, providing legal information, tools, and access to professionals who help individuals navigate the process more thoughtfully. Resources created specifically for Divorce & Beyond listeners are available at HelloDivorce.com/Susan. If This Episode Helped You Subscribe to Divorce & Beyond so you never miss an episode. Share it with someone who needs clear, reliable guidance right now. And if you have a moment, leaving a five-star review makes a real difference in helping this show reach the people who need it most. Follow Divorce & Beyond Website: divorceandbeyondpod.com Instagram: instagram.com/divorceandbeyondpod ________________________________________________________________________ About Our Host: Susan E. Guthrie, Esq. Susan E. Guthrie is one of the nation's leading family law and mediation attorneys, with more than 35 years of experience helping individuals navigate divorce with clarity and strategy. She is the Immediate Past Chair of the American Bar Association Section of Dispute Resolution, a best-selling author, and a sought-after speaker and trainer. Susan recently appeared as the featured expert on <a href='https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxXBpdFeYF4'
What If Your Divorce Case Is Already Building Itself Without You Knowing? Your texts. Your Venmo transactions. Your location history. Your Google searches. Even the files you thought you deleted. In divorce, your digital life is not just part of your story. It is the evidence. And right now, the advice circulating on social media about how to handle it is often incomplete, misleading, and in some cases dangerously wrong. In this solo episode, Susan Guthrie, top divorce attorney, mediator, and host of Divorce & Beyond, cuts through the noise with the clarity that comes from more than 35 years in the courtroom. She walks through what is trending on TikTok and Instagram right now, what popular media is actually getting right, and where the real legal risks live for people who act on bad information. Because access to information is not the same as having the legal right to use it. And one decision made in a moment of frustration can create consequences that follow your case all the way to its end. What You Will Learn What social media is getting right about digital footprints in divorce, and exactly where the advice breaks down Why the most damaging mistakes happen in moments of urgency, not deliberate choices The critical difference between building a case strategy and simply trying to catch your spouse, and why that distinction matters legally What courts are actually ruling about AI tools in divorce, including a real decision finding that AI chat logs were discoverable by the other side Why more information does not automatically strengthen your position, and how improperly obtained evidence can become leverage against you Five actionable takeaways, including why you must assume your entire digital life is discoverable from the moment divorce becomes a possibility Free Resource: The Tech Mistakes That Can Destroy Your Divorce Case Seven costly errors people are making right now with digital evidence in divorce, and what to do instead. This practical guide includes a before-you-act checklist, a social media reality check, and clear guidance on AI tools. Written by a nationally recognized divorce attorney. Get instant access at divorceandbeyondpod.com or click here: https://divorcebeyond.com/tech-traps-resource This Week's Sponsor: Hello Divorce Hello Divorce is a modern platform designed to support people before, during, and beyond divorce, providing legal information, tools, and access to professionals who help individuals navigate the process more thoughtfully. Resources created specifically for Divorce & Beyond listeners are available at HelloDivorce.com/Susan. If This Episode Helped You Subscribe to Divorce & Beyond so you never miss an episode. Share it with someone who needs clear, reliable guidance right now. And if you have a moment, leaving a five-star review makes a real difference in helping this show reach the people who need it most. Follow Divorce & Beyond Website: divorceandbeyondpod.com Instagram: <a href='https://i
Most people assume the hardest part of divorce is getting through it. What they do not realize is that the agreement they sign at the end is what they are going to live with long after it is over. Susan Guthrie has spent more than 35 years watching the same costly patterns show up in her work. What attorneys, mediators, and post-divorce litigation trends are revealing is that many of the most expensive problems people face after divorce are coming directly from how their agreements were structured in the first place. In so many of those situations, the real issue did not start with enforcement. It started with how the agreement was written, and how it was negotiated. In this solo episode, Susan walks through the five most costly mistakes people are making in divorce agreements right now, the patterns that keep showing up again and again, and how to avoid them before it is too late. What You’ll Learn Why rushing to be done is the most common and costly mistake in divorce, and why the agreement you rushed through today is the one you will wish you had slowed down for later How financial misunderstanding leads people to agree to things they do not fully understand, and why confusion in divorce is not neutral, it is expensive Why vague agreements do not create flexibility, they create conflict How emotional decision making during divorce leads to long-term consequences that people did not anticipate, and the one question Susan wants every listener to ask themselves before agreeing to anything Why not thinking about the beyond is one of the biggest drivers of future problems, and how to make sure your agreement is built to support your future, not just end your marriage Resources Mentioned in This Episode Hello Divorce Hello Divorce is a modern platform designed to support people before, during, and beyond divorce. The platform provides legal information, tools, and access to professionals who help individuals navigate divorce more thoughtfully and constructively. Explore resources created specifically for Divorce & Beyond listeners: HelloDivorce.com/Susan Free Resource: Before You Sign: 15 Questions to Ask Before You Sign Your Divorce Agreement Before you sign anything, download Susan's free companion resource for this episode: Before You Sign: 15 Questions to Ask Before You Sign Your Divorce Agreement. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do in this process is ask better questions and make sure the decisions you are making today are the ones your future self can live with. Find it at https://divorceandbeyondpod.com/latest-episode Listen Next: You Signed the Agreement. So Why Aren’t You Getting Paid? Critical Insights from Expert, Kelly Lise Murray It Is Not the Divorce That Breaks People. It Is the Years Leading Up to It with Erin Levine, Founder of Hello Divorce Mortgage Must-Knows for Divorce from Tami Wollensak, CDLP Secrets from a Top Realtor: Mastering the Real Estate Side of Divorce with Kathy Clark Make the Most of Your Listening Experience: If this episode resonates with you, be sure to: Subscribe to Divorce & Beyond so you never miss an episode. Share this episode with friends or loved ones who need hope and healing. Leave a 5-star review to help us reach even more listeners. Follow Us Online: Divorce & Beyond: https://divorceandbeyondpod.com, IG: @divorceandbeyondpod Meet Our Host Susan E. Guthrie®, Esq. is one of the nation’s leading family law and mediation experts, with more than 35 years of experience helping individuals and families navigate divorce and conflict with clarity and compassion. She is the
Two of Susan Guthrie's greatest passions, divorce and family law, and the world of AI, come together in this episode, and the result is something truly powerful. Post-separation abuse is something far too many people experience, but the legal system still struggles to understand. Many people assume that once someone leaves an abusive relationship, the danger is over. But in reality, the abuse often changes form. It can show up as litigation abuse, weaponized communication, or ongoing coercive control that leaves survivors feeling like they are still walking on eggshells, even in family court. Susan is joined by Anne Wintemute, co-founder and CEO of AimeeSays, an AI tool built specifically to support survivors of relationship abuse. AimeeSays helps survivors document their experiences, identify patterns of coercive control, and organize their story in a way that professionals and courts can actually understand. This is the bridge that has been missing. What You Will Learn Why the legal system tends to focus on isolated incidents rather than patterns of behavior, and why that gap can be so damaging for survivors How documenting patterns of coercive control, rather than individual incidents, can change the way a story is received in court Why survivors often struggle to tell their story clearly, and how trauma directly impacts testimony How AI technology is helping survivors organize their experiences and communicate what they have lived through in ways that courts and professionals can actually understand Why legal professionals need to know about tools like AimeeSays and how it can help them help their clients Golden Nuggets Leaving an abusive relationship does not always end the abuse. For many survivors, the abuse simply changes form, often showing up as litigation abuse, coercive control, and weaponized communication during and after divorce. One of the greatest challenges survivors face in family court is that the system tends to look for isolated incidents, while abuse often exists as a pattern of behavior over time. Being able to document those patterns clearly can make an enormous difference in how a story is understood. Technology may finally be helping to bridge that gap. Tools like AimeeSays are helping survivors organize their experiences, recognize patterns, and communicate what they have been living through in ways that courts and professionals can better understand. Divorce & Beyond Listeners Special Offer From Aimee Says: Visit the website: http://www.aimeesays.com - and use code "Guthrie30" for two free months of Aimee at aimeesays.com. Resources Mentioned in This Episode Hello Divorce Hello Divorce is a modern platform designed to support people before, during, and beyond divorce. The platform provides legal information, tools, and access to professionals who help individuals navigate divorce more thoughtfully and constructively. Explore resources created specifically for Divorce & Beyond listeners: HelloDivorce.com/Susan Free Resource: The Post-Separation Abuse Self-Assessment and Pattern Recognition Checklist If you or someone you know is navigating life after leaving an abusive relationship, Susan has created a resource to help you start making sense of what you have been experiencing. The Post-Separation Abuse Self-Assessment and Pattern Recognition Checklist is designed for survivors who are trying to identify patterns of coercive control and post-separation abuse, something that is honestly hard to see clearly when you are in the middle of it. Download the free Divorce Clarity Starter Guide here or on the website at: https://divorceandbeyondpod.com/latest-episode Special Offer from Yumiyu YUMIYU Jewelry is Susan’s favorite source for meaningful, handcrafted jewelry designed to empower women and celebrate individuality. Each piece is made with care, using high-quality materials like real gold and vermeil, and is water-resistant, non-tarnish, and hypoallergenic. During difficult times, like divorce, wearing a symbol of hope or protection—such as a hamsa or an evil eye—can be a
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If you are facing a break up, divorce or any other significant life change then the Divorce & Beyond® Podcast is what you have been looking for! Nationally recognized family law and divorce attorney and mediator, Susan Guthrie, shares her 30 plus years of experience in the field to help you navigate the choppy waters of change and to thrive and grow into your new future. Susan and her guest experts share their experience and expertise to provide you with the advice and insider knowledge that others pay thousands of dollars for and support you with all you need to know to get through this difficult time an on to your new life BEYOND!
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