The Kink Consultant

Dating Advice for Men & Women: Flirting, Confidence and Attraction with Connell Barrett

May 14, 2026·59 min
Episode Description from the Publisher

Flirting is supposed to be fun, not complicated. In this episode, I’m joined by dating coach and author Connell Barrett for a conversation about flirting, confidence, dating apps, rejection, and why so many people are overthinking connection. We talk about authenticity in dating, the difference between charming persistence and creepy persistence, why trying too hard is one of the biggest turn-offs, and how flirting is really just about making someone feel seen. Connell also shares practical dating advice for approaching people in real life, navigating dating apps without losing your mind, and why confidence has less to do with “alpha energy” and more to do with honesty, playfulness, and presenceWe also get into pickup artist culture, negging, ghosting, rejection sensitivity, and the very real loneliness so many people are dealing with right now. There’s dating horror stories, flirting examples that somehow become weirdly kinky, and a lot of honest conversation about what actually creates attraction beyond status, money, or “the three sixes.” If dating has been feeling exhausting, performative, or impossible lately, this episode is going to feel like a very refreshing reality check.Connect with Connell Barretthttps://datingtransformation.com/https://www.instagram.com/datingtransformation/Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Book A Consult Call with Amanda https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Courses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

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