Ep 27: Put on Your Mask First — Nick DeMarinis on Being the Dad You Want to Be

Most dads ease into fatherhood one kid at a time. Nick DeMarinis skipped that part. He found out he was having identical twin boys while living in Hong Kong, 8,000 miles from family. In this episode, Nick shares the blueprint he built for present, intentional fatherhood: setting expectations with employers so he never misses what matters, co-parenting as a true team, and taking care of himself first so he has something real to give. From WeWork's turnaround to a PopAShot national championship, Nick proves you don't have to sacrifice the dad you want to be.Key takeaways:How Nick's parents — a bread man and a teacher from New York — gave him a clear blueprint for fatherhoodWhy moving back from Hong Kong with twin infants taught him the power of structure and disciplineHow radical transparency with employers creates space for the dad commitments that matterThe "survive and advance" mindset that got him and his wife through the first year with twinsWhy intentional one-on-one time with each twin is one of the most underrated things twin parents can doWhat his son Max's act of compassion toward a crying classmate told him about the dad he's becomingHow the PopAShot national championship became a lesson in resilience and creativity for his boysThe oxygen mask principle — why taking care of yourself first is the most selfless thing a dad can doIf you enjoyed The Dad Manual, leave us a rating on your podcast app! If you loved it, share this episode with a Dad! Send your questions to dadmanualpodcast@gmail.com. Connect with Tony Cooper: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thetonycooper/00:00 Nick introduces himself as Max and Luca's dad02:15 Why the podcast format resonated with Nick right away05:00 Growing up one of six kids in an Irish Italian Catholic family08:30 Mom's compassion and adventure, dad's discipline and relationships12:00 Moving to Hong Kong with LinkedIn — six years abroad14:30 Finding out they're having identical twin boys17:00 Seeing parenting in his older siblings — adoption, cerebral palsy, presence21:00 The kind of dad Nick declared he would be from the start24:30 Never missing a single pregnancy appointment27:00 Paternity leave — being there for Diana, not just the babies29:30 Moving back to the US, joining WeWork, the wild ride begins33:00 Transparency at work — "the best job I've ever had is being a dad"36:30 Creating the conditions you want instead of accepting default ones40:00 Co-parenting as a team — playing to each other's strengths44:00 The first year with twins: structure, survival, and celebrate every win49:30 Max helping a crying classmate — the proudest dad moment53:00 Luca as the voice of reason in a heated disagreement55:30 Advice for twin parents: intentional one-on-one time58:30 PopAShot: from shy crybaby to national championship competitor64:00 Two Guinness World Records — 232 consecutive shots, 103-foot shot68:00 What the boys have learned watching Nick compete, fail, and try again72:00 Final advice: put on your oxygen mask first