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The Adoption Files: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Ande Stanley
The Adoption files seeks to provide a place for adoptees and allies to discuss the laws preventing adoptees from accessing their identities, and the emotional and physical challenges adoptees face in the process of dealing with the obstacles we face. We recognize the need to expose the problematic aspects of the adoption industry and the narrative they perpetuate. We will not only talk about the laws and the challenges they create, but also the ways that the mythology around adoption impacts the way we move through our lives, as adopted people and as mothers and other family members.
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- 4 days ago56 min
How to use Spirituality as a Defense against Discomfort: Spiritual Bypassing
Please join us as we continue our conversation around spiritual trauma and adoption as we work our way through the book Holy Hurt: Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing by Hillary L McBride PhD . Todays' episode explores the concept of spiritual bypassing as a coping mechanism to avoid feeling our core emotions. Joining me again today is Dani Joy, mom, homesteader, exvangelical. Dani can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoyhttps://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions. The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professional.Thank you for listening!
- 1 weeks ago59 min
Your Feelings Matter: the Core Emotions and Spiritual Trauma
Please join Dani Joy and I as we delve into the core emotions and how we are born with these crucial forms of communication. We continue to explore how adoption and spiritual trauma intersect, using the book Holly Hurt as a framework for our discussion. Dani Joy can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoyhttps://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/Mentioned in the episode: https://www.relinquishedbook.com/https://savingoursistersadoption.org/saving-our-sisters-about-us/https://thefamilypreservationproject.com/https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinionsThe host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalThank you for listening!
- 2 weeks ago50 min
Victim, Villain, Valiant Hero: The Drama Triangle and Spiritual Trauma
Please join Dani Joy and I as we continue our conversation about spiritual trauma and adoption. We are using the book Holy Hurt: Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing by Hillary L McBride, PhD as a scaffold for our conversation. We just started Chapter 5! How do the roles of victim, villain and rescuer play out in your life? What do they have to do with spiritual trauma? With adoption? Let us know what you think after you join us for the episode. Dani Joy can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoyShe loves to hear from people!https://hillarylmcbride.com/books/https://mental-health-matters.org/2021/01/20/what-is-the-karpman-drama-triangle/https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions,The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalThank you for listening!
- 3 weeks ago1h 5m
Let's: See What Develops: The Essentials. Continuing the conversation on spiritual trauma
Please join Dani Joy and me as we continue to discuss spiritual trauma and adoption. I am a Late Discovery, Intercountry adopted person. Dani is a mother of loss to adoption. Dani can be found at https://medium.com/@danijoyhttps://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/https://health.clevelandclinic.org/generational-traumahttps://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC12220155/https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6378493/https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinionsthe host is not a lawyer, therapist, or an adoption professionalthank you for listening
- Jun 30, 202638 min
Returning to the Familiar: When we keep going back to things that hurt
Please join Dani Joy and I as we continue to explore spiritual trauma using the book Holy Hurt by Hillary L McBride Phd as a scaffold for our discussion. How might these spiritual wounds relate to Dani's experience as a mother of loss to adoption? How has my being an adopted person been shaped by spiritual trauma? In this installment we talk about the return to the familiar, even when the familiar hurts. Dani Joy is a mother of loss to adoption, a homesteader and blogger. She can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoyhttps://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/post-traumatic-stress-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20355967https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/24881-cptsd-complex-ptsdhttps://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinionsThe host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalThank you for listening.
- Jun 26, 202653 min
What we need from the beginning: Continuing the conversation on spiritual trauma
Please join Dani Joy and I as we discuss the section What we need from the beginning, from the book Holy Hurt by Hilary L McBride, PhD.Dani is a mother of loss to adoption, as well as a homesteader, advocate and writer. Dani can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoyhttps://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions. The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalThank you for listening!
- Jun 22, 20267 min
Alert: California SB 381. California adopted people need your support
California Alliance For Adoptee Rights and Senator Wahab have a bill being heard in the Health Committee this Tuesday, 23 June 2026. They need you to call the members of the Health Committee to ask that they vote yes on the bill as it is written, without amendments. Please follow the link to find a script and the phone numbers of the members of the Health Committee. https://www.facebook.com/CAadopteerights/posts/pfbid034DfNoKF8Kd3KM7c5jHPbu7XEAKBGkhFMbmLAH2GTVTzBQLcbjkZsFadKhyvMaBgSlIf for some reason the link does not work, please go to California Alliance for Adoptee Rights and click on the featured post at the top of the page. Thank you so much for your support. The host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professional.The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions. Thank you for listening.
- Jun 10, 202639 min
The Culture we Swim in, Pt 2. Spiritual Trauma is NOT fun!
Please join me and Dani Joy as we continue our conversation about the intersection of spiritual trauma and adoption. We are talking trauma, just nonstop, processing! It's so fun. Come have fun with us! We are using the book Holy Hurt; Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing as a scaffold for our conversations. Dani can be found at: https://medium.com/@danijoyI can be found here, pretty much. https://hillarylmcbride.com/holy-hurt-book/https://www.healthcentral.com/mental-health/get-help-mental-healthThe opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinionsThe host is not a lawyer, a therapist or an adoption professionalPlease consider rating and sharing the episode. Thank you!
About The Adoption Files
The Adoption files seeks to provide a place for adoptees and allies to discuss the laws preventing adoptees from accessing their identities, and the emotional and physical challenges adoptees face in the process of dealing with the obstacles we face. We recognize the need to expose the problematic aspects of the adoption industry and the narrative they perpetuate. We will not only talk about the laws and the challenges they create, but also the ways that the mythology around adoption impacts the way we move through our lives, as adopted people and as mothers and other family members.
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