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Sex and Psychology Podcast: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Dr. Justin Lehmiller
The Sex and Psychology Podcast is the sex ed you never got in school—and won’t find anywhere else. Kinsey Institute researcher Dr. Justin Lehmiller takes you on a journey through the psychology of sex and relationships, offering practical tips along the way that can help you take your intimate life to the next level.
Latest Episodes
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- Today30 min
Episode 510: The Science Of Sexual Arousal
A lot of people think that if you’re attracted to someone, arousal should just naturally happen. But it’s not that simple. In this episode, we explore the science of sexual arousal, the many pathways through which desire can emerge, and how stress, trauma, burnout, and major life experiences can reshape our relationship with pleasure. My guest is Kayna Cassard, a sex therapist, painful sex specialist, certified trauma therapist, and author of the book Arousal, Answered: An Expert’s Guide to Authentic Pleasure and Liberating Sex. Her mission is to help others liberate themselves from outdated sexual scripts and empower them to rewrite their authentic sexual narratives. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: How can understanding the brain unlock more pleasure? Why is desire more complex than spontaneous vs. responsive? What role do stress, safety, and connection play in arousal? Why is it so hard to stay present during sex? How can becoming more embodied enhance desire? You can visit Kayna’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! If you’re ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it’s time to check out Drive Boost. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
- 4 days ago29 min
Episode 509: Out-Of-Control Sexual Behavior In Women
When people hear about “out-of-control” sexual behavior, they tend to think of men. But women can struggle with it too, and their experiences have often been overlooked or misunderstood because most of the research and treatment models were built around male experiences. Today, we’re exploring the psychology of out-of-control sexual behavior in women, and what people often get wrong about it. I am joined once again by Jess Levith, a licensed marriage and family therapist and AASECT certified sex therapist. She’s fully trained in both attachment-focused EMDR therapy and trauma-focused acceptance and commitment therapy, works with LGBTQQIA+ and kinky folks, consensual non-monogamy, women’s sexual health, and out-of-control sexual behavior. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: What do we misunderstand about women’s experiences with problematic sexual behavior? How do you distinguish between a high sex drive and sexual behavior that truly feels out of control? How do clinicians separate genuine sexual dysregulation from sexual shame? How does out-of-control sexual behavior differ in women and men? If someone feels their sexual behavior is out of control, where should they start in seeking help? You can follow Jess on Instagram to stay updated about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Level-up your bedroom skills with Beducated. Featuring more than 150 online courses taught by the experts, Beducated brings pleasure-based sex ed directly into your bedroom. Kick off your journey by taking Beducated’s Quiz to get your personalized roadmap to sexual happiness at https://beduc.at/pd2624-lehmiller *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
- 1 weeks ago31 min
Episode 508: When Your Sexuality Changes Later In Life
Most people think sexuality is something we figure out early in life. But for many people, major realizations about their sexuality don’t happen until much later, sometimes after decades in heterosexual relationships or marriages. Today, we’re exploring the psychology of coming out later in life and what happens when you discover aspects of your sexuality you never fully understood before. My guest is Jess Levith, a licensed marriage and family therapist and AASECT certified sex therapist. She’s fully trained in both attachment-focused EMDR therapy and trauma-focused acceptance and commitment therapy, works with LGBTQ+ and kinky folks, consensual non-monogamy, women’s sexual health, and out-of-control sexual behavior. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: Why might someone not fully understand their sexuality until later in adulthood? Is coming out later in life always about repression, or can something else be happening? What is sexual emergence, and how does it differ from coming out? How can people approach conversations about changing sexuality with long-term partners in honest, compassionate ways? You can follow Jess on Instagram to stay updated about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
- 1 weeks ago29 min
Episode 507: Is Non-Monogamy Right For You?
A lot of people are curious about non-monogamy. But there’s a big difference between liking the idea of it and knowing whether it genuinely fits your emotional needs, attachment style, and relationship temperament. So how do you know if non-monogamy is right for you? That’s what we’re exploring in this episode. I am joined once again by Kate Loree, LMFT, a sex-positive psychotherapist, author, and speaker specializing in trauma, relationships, sexuality, and non-traditional relationship structures. She is the author of Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships. She also co-hosts the Open Deeply podcast with Sunny Megatron. Some of the specific topics we explore include: How can you tell whether you genuinely want non-monogamy or simply like the idea of it? What are signs you may be overriding yourself to make non-monogamy work? How can you assess whether non-monogamy is a good fit for you? How can you safely and honestly explore the relationship style that fits you best? Learn more about Kate’s work by visiting her website. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Soaking Wet from VB Health is the world’s first probiotic specifically designed for vaginal and vulva health and wellness. It’s a doctor formulated blend of prebiotics, probiotics, and vitamins specifically designed to restore balance and increase lubrication. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
- 2 weeks ago30 min
Episode 506: Trauma-Informed Non-Monogamy
People often think successful non-monogamy comes down to communication, boundaries, and relationship agreements. But underneath those conversations are deeper psychological dynamics involving attachment, emotional safety, and nervous system regulation. In today’s episode, we’re exploring what it means to approach consensual non-monogamy through a trauma-informed lens. My guest is Kate Loree, LMFT, a sex-positive psychotherapist, author, and speaker specializing in trauma, relationships, sexuality, and non-traditional relationship structures. She is the author of Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships. She also co-hosts the Open Deeply podcast with Sunny Megatron. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: What does “trauma-informed non-monogamy” actually mean? What are signs someone may be consenting without truly feeling grounded internally? How can somatic tracking help us better understand our intuitions? How can jealousy be reframed as a source of curiosity rather than anxiety? How can people assess whether they’re emotionally ready for consensual non-monogamy? Learn more about Kate’s work by visiting her website. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Soaking Wet from VB Health is the world’s first probiotic specifically designed for vaginal and vulva health and wellness. It’s a doctor formulated blend of prebiotics, probiotics, and vitamins specifically designed to restore balance and increase lubrication. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off. If you’re looking to gain a broad understanding of human sexuality or refresh your knowledge, check out the upcoming Human Sexuality Intensive courses at the Kinsey Institute: https://kinseyinstitute.org/learning/human-sexuality-intensive.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
- 2 weeks ago29 min
Episode 505: How To Move Beyond Small Talk
Most people say they want deeper relationships and more meaningful connection, yet many conversations stay stuck at the surface level. We talk about work, schedules, the weather, or whatever else feels safe. So why is it so hard to move beyond small talk? In this episode, we’re exploring the science of meaningful conversation, from curiosity and attention to vulnerability, flirting, and emotional openness. I am joined once again by Nicholas Epley, the John Templeton Keller Distinguished Service Professor of Behavior Science, and Director of the Roman Family Center for Decision Research, at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business. He is the author of Mindwise: How We Understand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want. His latest book is A Little More Social: How Small Choices Create Unexpected Happiness, Health, and Connection. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: Why do so many conversations stay surface-level? What kinds of questions foster closeness? How do we balance vulnerability with oversharing? Can people tell when they don’t fully have our attention? What small conversational shifts create deeper connection? You can visit Nicholas’ website to learn more about his work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.*** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
- 3 weeks ago33 min
Episode 504: Why We Avoid Connection (Even When We Crave It)
We live in a world where people are more digitally connected than ever, yet loneliness remains incredibly common. Most of us move through daily life surrounded by strangers while following an unspoken rule: don’t engage. In this episode, we’re exploring why humans are so socially cautious, but also why even brief conversations with strangers can meaningfully improve our happiness, health, and sense of connection. My guest is Nicholas Epley, the John Templeton Keller Distinguished Service Professor of Behavior Science, and Director of the Roman Family Center for Decision Research, at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business. He is the author of Mindwise: How We Understand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want. His latest book is A Little More Social: How Small Choices Create Unexpected Happiness, Health, and Connection. Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include: Why are conversations with strangers usually better than we expect? Do people really want to be left alone in public? Why do small moments of connection matter so much? How has technology changed everyday social interaction? For people who want to be a little more social, what’s a good starting point? You can visit Nicholas’ website to learn more about his work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! This spring, give yourself the kind of comfort that lives with you all day — not just the moment you get home. Head to cozyearth.com and use my code JUSTIN for an exclusive 20% off. If you’re looking for a dating experience where you can explore on your own terms, check out Feeld, a dating app for the curious. Go to feeld.co or download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
- 3 weeks ago30 min
Episode 503: Why Sexual Communication Feels So Hard
A lot of couples struggle to talk about sex because those conversations can feel incredibly vulnerable. And if the topic comes up at all, it’s often only when there’s a problem in the bedroom, which makes every discussion feel loaded with pressure, shame, defensiveness, or fear of rejection. In today’s episode, we’ll discuss how couples can communicate about intimacy in healthier and more productive ways. I am joined once again by Michelle Fischler, an ASTO Certified Sex Therapist with over a decade of clinical experience. She is also the founder of GETSOME, a platform and podcast dedicated to dissolving sexual shame. Her new book is titled Coming Soon: The Unshaming Guide to Early Ejaculation and Lasting Longer. Some of the specific topics we explore include: Why do conversations about sex feel so vulnerable? How can couples make talking about sex feel less high-stakes? How does shame complicate sexual communication? What mistakes do couples make when discussing intimacy problems? What helps partners feel safer talking about sex? You can check out Michelle’s website to learn more about her work and follow her on the socials at @getsome_podcast Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors! Load Boost is a supplement designed to improve the taste, volume, and overall health of your semen. If you want to elevate your sexual performance, check out Load Boost from VB Health. Visit vb.health to learn more and save 10% with code JUSTIN. The Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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About Sex and Psychology Podcast
The Sex and Psychology Podcast is the sex ed you never got in school—and won’t find anywhere else. Kinsey Institute researcher Dr. Justin Lehmiller takes you on a journey through the psychology of sex and relationships, offering practical tips along the way that can help you take your intimate life to the next level.
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