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Feminist Wellness: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Béa Victoria Albina
You weren't born anxious, depleted, and second-guessing yourself. You were taught to be. The Feminist Wellness podcast is where nervous system science meets the truth nobody wants to say out loud: most of what you think is "self-care" is just performing wellness while your body stays stuck in survival mode. Host Béa Victoria Albina - NP, life coach, and Somatic Experiencing Practitioner - breaks down the codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing habits that keep you trapped in what she calls Emotional Outsourcing™: constantly looking outside yourself for permission, validation, and proof that you're enough. This isn't another show about bubble baths and boundaries. It's about understanding why your body says yes when you mean no, why rest feels impossible, and how to stop treating your own needs like an inconvenience. If you're done white-knuckling your way through life, performing okayness while feeling like you're constantly failing some invisible test, this show will help you see what's actually happening - and what becomes possible when you stop abandoning yourself to please everyone else.
Latest Episodes
The most recent episodes — sign up to get AI-powered summaries of each one.
- Yesterday26 min
Ep #403: Parental Curiosity: Were Your Parents Actually Interested in You?
#403: Did your parents actually want to know you? Not just how you were doing at school or whether you were behaving, but what you thought, felt, loved, and wondered about? This week, I explore parental curiosity and what happens when we grow up with parents who provide for us but aren't particularly interested in our inner worlds. I look at how this quiet absence can shape our sense of worth, teach us to focus on everyone else's needs, and contribute to emotional outsourcing, people pleasing, and perfectionism. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/403 Order your copy of End Emotional Outsourcing here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=enMentioned in this episode:Join The Shift today!You cancel plans with yourself the moment someone else needs something. You say yes when everything in you means no. You have watched yourself do it and been genuinely bewildered. The Shift is 12 weeks of structured somatic practice built around the three needs at the root of every Emotional Outsourcing pattern: safety, worth, and belonging. The same foundational methodology as Anchored, structured entirely around your own life. Check it out here: https://feminist-wellness.captivate.fm/theshiftThe Shift
- 3 days ago11 min
Tenderoni Hotline #51: Did I Make It All Up or Am I Actually Hurt? | Paperback Book Series
Tenderoni Hotline #51: You can spot when someone's being lousy to other people from 3 miles away. You're like an emotional bloodhound who knows when your friend is lying, when your coworker is stressed, when your mom is about to lose it. But when someone hurts you, you suddenly need a jury of 12 of your peers to confirm that what just happened was actually messed up and maybe it's okay for you to be hurt.This habit of emotional outsourcing at its most painful means you're literally giving away your right to trust your own experience and handing it over to the person who hurt you, random friends, or the internet.This is such a crucial part of what I teach in my book, End Emotional Outsourcing. In the book, you'll learn about the nervous system science behind why you doubt yourself, plus, of course, somatic body-based practices to help you reconnect with your body's wisdom.Order the book now at https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Got a question for the Tenderoni Hotline? Send it to me at: podcast@beatrizalbina.com Learn more about my courses and apply here: https://www.beatrizalbina.com/courses Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en
- 1 weeks ago31 min
Ep #402: Eldest Daughter Syndrome: You Were Never Supposed to Do It All
#402: Are you exhausted by how incompetent everyone around you seems, yet somehow still feel responsible for making sure everything gets done? What if your irritation isn't simply a personality flaw, but a response to everything you were expected to carry as a child?In this episode, I explore the eldest daughter role, which isn't necessarily about birth order. It's about being the child who learned to anticipate everyone's needs, manage the household, and never need too much herself. I look at how this role can develop into emotional outsourcing, perfectionism, hypervigilance, and a deep exhaustion that rest alone can't fix.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/402 Order your copy of End Emotional Outsourcing here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=enMentioned in this episode:Join Nervous System Signals and Safety!You understand your anxiety. You can name your triggers, trace them back, explain the whole thing. And your body still does what it does - the freeze, the brace, the exhaustion that has nothing to do with how much you slept. Working at the level where the pattern actually lives - your nervous system, your physiology - is what changes it. Signals & Safety is 12 weeks of somatic education and practice built from 20+ years of clinical training. You come out knowing why your body responds the way it does, and with the tools to meet yourself differently in the moments that used to undo you. Check it out here: https://feminist-wellness.captivate.fm/signalsandsafetyNervous System Signals and Safety
- 1 weeks ago15 min
Tenderoni Hotline #50: You're Not Loving Them, You're Managing Them | Paperback Book Series
Tenderoni Hotline #50: Your value isn't in your productivity. That uncomfortable feeling when you stop moving, stop doing, stop managing everyone else's life? That's not laziness talking. It's the voice of a nervous system that learned early on that being needed equals being safe.Your actual people want you to rest. They want you to have needs, wants, preferences. They want to take care of you sometimes too. And all of this is exactly what I break down in my new book, End Emotional Outsourcing.Order the book now at https://beatrizalbina.com/bookGot a question for the Tenderoni Hotline? Send it to me at: podcast@beatrizalbina.comLearn more about my courses and apply here: https://www.beatrizalbina.com/courses Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en
- 2 weeks ago31 min
Ep #401: Take Me at My Word (Part 2): When Helping Becomes Pushing
#401: What happens when your good intentions leave someone you love feeling unheard? When you keep offering suggestions, asking if they're sure, or trying to convince them to change their mind, even after they've given you a clear answer? In this episode, I explore the role of the pusher and how emotional outsourcing can lead us to manage other people's choices because of our own discomfort, anxiety, or fear of not mattering. I look at why we sometimes mistake being useful for being loved, and how repeated attempts to help can erode trust and create distance in our relationships. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/401 Order your copy of End Emotional Outsourcing here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=enMentioned in this episode:Join Nervous System Signals and Safety!You understand your anxiety. You can name your triggers, trace them back, explain the whole thing. And your body still does what it does - the freeze, the brace, the exhaustion that has nothing to do with how much you slept. Working at the level where the pattern actually lives - your nervous system, your physiology - is what changes it. Signals & Safety is 12 weeks of somatic education and practice built from 20+ years of clinical training. You come out knowing why your body responds the way it does, and with the tools to meet yourself differently in the moments that used to undo you. Check it out here: https://feminist-wellness.captivate.fm/signalsandsafetyNervous System Signals and Safety
- 2 weeks ago12 min
Tenderoni Hotline #49: How to Stop Shrinking Yourself for Others | Paperback Book Series
Tenderoni Hotline #49: This episode explores how childhood messages about being "too much" create lifelong patterns of self-shrinking that affect every area of your life. When you spend years making yourself smaller to fit other people's comfort levels, you lose track of where you end and their expectations begin.But what if I told you that's a lie? What if I told you that the right people are starving for your realness? What if I told you that your "too much" is actually someone else's "just right?" What if you're not too much at all? What if you've just been around people who are too small for your bigness?This is exactly why I wrote End Emotional Outsourcing, to help you stop apologizing for who you are and start celebrating your fullest self.Order the book now at https://beatrizalbina.com/bookGot a question for the Tenderoni Hotline? Send it to me at: podcast@beatrizalbina.com Learn more about my courses and apply here: https://www.beatrizalbina.com/courses Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en
- 3 weeks ago40 min
Ep #400: Take Me at My Word (Part 1): How to Stop Second-Guessing When Others Question You
#400: Have you ever clearly said what you want, only to have someone question it, suggest something else, or act like they know your preferences better than you do? This week, I explore what happens when we are not taken at our word, especially in our closest relationships. We look at how having our desires, feelings, and internal experiences repeatedly questioned can slowly create self-doubt, disconnect us from ourselves, and reinforce emotional outsourcing patterns. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/400 Order your copy of End Emotional Outsourcing here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=enMentioned in this episode:Join Nervous System Signals and Safety!You understand your anxiety. You can name your triggers, trace them back, explain the whole thing. And your body still does what it does - the freeze, the brace, the exhaustion that has nothing to do with how much you slept. Working at the level where the pattern actually lives - your nervous system, your physiology - is what changes it. Signals & Safety is 12 weeks of somatic education and practice built from 20+ years of clinical training. You come out knowing why your body responds the way it does, and with the tools to meet yourself differently in the moments that used to undo you. Check it out here: https://feminist-wellness.captivate.fm/signalsandsafetyNervous System Signals and Safety
- 3 weeks ago7 min
Tenderoni Hotline #48: Are You Performing? | Paperback Book Series
Tenderoni Hotline #48: There's this bone-deep fatigue that seeps into you when you've been performing yourself for everyone else instead of living your life for you.It's different from being tired after a busy day. It's the exhaustion that comes from constantly calculating what version of yourself the room needs.Meanwhile, real love doesn't require a costume. No tap dancing required for real, true, authentic, grounded, open-hearted love, love, love.That's what my book, End Emotional Outsourcing, is all about: helping you take off the mask and discover that this big, messy world needs the real you, not the performing you.Order the book now at https://beatrizalbina.com/bookGot a question for the Tenderoni Hotline? Send it to me at: podcast@beatrizalbina.comLearn more about my courses and apply here: https://www.beatrizalbina.com/courses Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en
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About Feminist Wellness
You weren't born anxious, depleted, and second-guessing yourself. You were taught to be. The Feminist Wellness podcast is where nervous system science meets the truth nobody wants to say out loud: most of what you think is "self-care" is just performing wellness while your body stays stuck in survival mode. Host Béa Victoria Albina - NP, life coach, and Somatic Experiencing Practitioner - breaks down the codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing habits that keep you trapped in what she calls Emotional Outsourcing™: constantly looking outside yourself for permission, validation, and proof that you're enough. This isn't another show about bubble baths and boundaries. It's about understanding why your body says yes when you mean no, why rest feels impossible, and how to stop treating your own needs like an inconvenience. If you're done white-knuckling your way through life, performing okayness while feeling like you're constantly failing some invisible test, this show will help you see what's actually happening - and what becomes possible when you stop abandoning yourself to please everyone else.
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