Adult Child of Dysfunction

E 368: Tammy's Takes #44: Did Childhood Trauma Become Your Personality?

September 7, 2026·7 min
Episode Description from the Publisher

Have you ever stopped to wonder if the person you think you are... is actually the person you had to become to survive?In this week's Tammy's Takes, I'm reflecting on one of the most thought-provoking ideas from my conversation with author Megan DeMatteo, and taking it one step further. As adult children, many of us spend years believing that our people-pleasing, perfectionism, anxiety, hypervigilance, or difficulty trusting others is simply part of our personality. But what if those behaviors aren't your identity at all? What if they're survival strategies your nervous system developed to keep you safe?In this episode, I invite you to look beneath those patterns and ask a powerful question that I often use with my coaching clients:"Who would I be if I no longer believed I had to survive?"Together, we'll explore how childhood experiences shape the beliefs we carry into adulthood, why those beliefs often feel like who we are, and how healing begins when we separate our authentic self from the adaptations that once protected us. I'll also guide you through a simple reflective exercise that can help you reconnect with the person underneath the fear, the people-pleasing, the perfectionism, and the constant need to prove your worth.If you've ever felt like you've lost yourself while trying to keep everyone else happy, this episode is for you. My hope is that you'll walk away with more compassion for yourself, a deeper understanding of your survival patterns, and the reminder that you are not broken—you adapted.If you're ready to go deeper, I'd love to help you continue your healing journey. My signature course, Trials to Triumph: An Adult Child's Beginning Roadmap to Your Healing Journey, is available for 90% off with coupon code THRIVE25.👉 Learn more at www.tammyvincent.com/courseHey there, I’m so glad you’re here and tuning in! If this episode spoke to your heart, just know there’s even more support waiting for you.Book Your Free Clarity and Calm Call: No Judgement, just a chat https://calendly.com/tammyvincent/clarity-and-calm-callIf you are curious about where you stand energetically, or just need a frequency boost, book your FREE biofrequency voice scan here: https://calendly.com/tammyvincent/complimentary-scan-demo if you want to take part in an amazing club, where you can get unlimited scans and free coaching every month, sign up here: $25 ($250 Value) Join For One Month Here https://workshops.tammyvincent.com/offers/JQz3QDrr/checkoutIf you would like to ask a question, and hear the answer in a future episode, please leave your question here: https://www.speakpipe.com/TammyvincentcoachingTrials To Triumph: An Adult Child's Emotional Freedom Blueprint: Use code THRIVE25 for 75% off today. https://workshops.tammyvincent.com/offers/DSbcgrZZ/checkoutAs an international inspirational speaker, NLP Practitioner, Trauma-Informed Coach, Neurofit Trainer, and Best-Selling Author, I bring both deep personal experience and professional training to the work I do. I believe in prevention, not just intervention — and use a body, mind, and spirit approach to guide others toward becoming the happiest, healthiest versions of themselves.My holistic toolbox includes nervous system regulation, trauma-informed coaching, nutritional support, and natural healing strategies,🔑 Start Your Healing JourneyFind ALL THE THINGS HERE: Anything that I have to offer is right here✈️ Bonus for Travel Lovers!Did you know I also offer access to an amazing travel savings program that can help you save up to 70% on hotels, resorts, cruises, and more? Let’s compare your next upcoming itinerary and see how much you could save.👉 Try the Trip Check: https://calendly.com/tammyvincent/trip-check📺 <

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