The Whole Parent Podcast

Is it HARMFUL to Ask Older Siblings to Help? #90

May 19, 2026·33 min
Episode Description from the Publisher

A viral clip says that telling your older child to “help your sister” damages both kids. I get why that message spreads fast, especially if you grew up as the oldest and felt like too much landed on your shoulders. But developmental psychology is more nuanced than a scroll-stopping soundbite, and mixing up parentification with age-appropriate help can leave parents stuck and anxious about every request they make. I break down what the research actually supports: yes, it can be unhealthy when...

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