Episode 981: The Psychology of Why People Refer

Synopsis Dean Jackson explains to guest host Spencer Reynolds how you can use the psychology behind referrals to your benefit in BNI and in business. Referrals are driven by self-preservation. People make referrals to add value to their own social groups. People are highly protective of their close connections and want to share good experiences and warn against bad ones. Recommending useful resources raises a person’s standing within their group, creating a natural sense of mutual value exchange. Instead of asking your referral partners to tell people about you, train them to identify opportunities and report them back to you. Make the referrer the hero. Create valuable, easy-to-share materials your referral partners can pass along. Links Visit Dean’s website: https://deanjackson.com. Listen to the I Love Marketing Podcast. Visit the BNI Tampa Bay website. The Official BNI Podcast is sponsored by Misner Audio Programs. Complete Transcript of Episode 981 Priscilla:Hello, everybody, and welcome back to The Official BNI Podcast. I’m Priscilla Rice, and I’m coming to you from Live Oak Recording Studio in Berkeley, California. And I’m joined on the phone today by Spencer Reynolds, who is standing in today as a guest host for Dr. Misner, and he will be joining us from time to time. Hello, Spencer. Welcome to the podcast. Spencer:Thank you, Priscilla. I appreciate it. Excited to be with you. Priscilla:It’s great to have you. And who are you presenting us with today? Spencer:Today’s guest is someone that has spent decades, honestly, with business owners and teaching them a really powerful truth about marketing, and that it’s the world happens through relationships and trust and referrals. He’s a legendary marketer. He’s a co-host of an iconic podcast called I Love Marketing, and he’s a brilliant thinker on philosophy. And this is a good friend of mine. His name is Dean Jackson. Dean, welcome to the show. Dean:Thank you. Welcome. Glad to be here. Spencer:Yeah, you know, Dean, it’s hard to believe that we’ve known each other for 24 years now. Dean:Is that how long it’s been? That’s crazy. Spencer:And I’m only 22 in my head, so that math. Dean:Yeah, exactly. Me too. That’s so funny. We actually had Dr. Misner on our I Love Marketing podcast years ago. Spencer:Fantastic. Well, Dean, today I really want to talk about some of the wisdom that you’ve learned over years inside of marketing, and referrals in particular. But let’s talk about why. You know, Simon Sinek says start with why. So let’s start with why do people refer? Dean:I think that’s the biggest misconception that people have is that often one of the first blocks we have to overcome to really optimize the number of referrals that you can get, is to understand that people are not referring as a favor to you or a gift to you. When you have this mindset that you have to earn referrals or that you are somehow asking for referrals, you’re going down a path that is kind of counter to what we, as species, have evolved to do. As long as we have been playing the cooperation game and escape the food chain, basically we’ve become the most successful species ever. That we have learned the importance of looking out for each other and maintaining what I call our status in the herd. That if we look at it, that that’s the primary reason that we do anything,