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Sex for Saints: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Amanda Louder
As a Certified Sex & Marriage Coach, and a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, Amanda Louder helps conservative Christian women love their sex life! In this podcast, Amanda helps women embrace their sexuality so that they can become the woman they were created to be. She teaches you how to integrate sexuality into your marriage in a loving and healthy way, get rid of the drama and negative emotions around sex in your marriage, and develop a better relationship to yourself, your spouse, and your sexuality.
Latest Episodes
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- 2 days ago30 min
Episode 439 - Why the Changes You Make Never Last
Most couples who come to me have already tried. They have read the books, taken the courses, sat with a therapist, and walked out with a plan they both believed in. And it worked, for a few weeks, maybe a few months, before everything slid back to exactly where it was. In this episode I use an iceberg model I heard Brene Brown describe to explain why that keeps happening. The problem you can see is only the tip. Through the story of one couple who made the same plan five separate times, I walk down all four layers and show why the changes you make never last, and what actually has to shift for them to hold. The Iceberg Under Your Marriage Graphic
- 1 weeks ago37 min
Episode 438 – The Art of Receiving: Why It's So Hard and Why It Matters
Many conversations about improving your sex life focus on what men can do differently. But there's another side that rarely gets talked about: women who can't receive. In this episode, Amanda breaks down two distinct patterns — the wife who checks out and endures, and the wife who keeps redirecting everything back to her husband — exploring why each happens, where the need for control comes from, and what it actually takes to change. Whether you're the one struggling to receive or the husband who's stopped trying, this episode offers a way forward. Get the worksheet here
- 2 weeks ago17 min
Episode 437 – Six Patterns That End Marriages
After thousands of hours on Zoom with couples, I can usually tell by the second or third conversation which marriages are going to make it. It has almost nothing to do with the size of the problem. In this episode I walk through the six patterns I watch for, what each one sounds like on a call, and what to do if you see your own marriage in one of them. Recognizing one is not a verdict. It's information you can work with. Here is this episode's worksheet.
- 3 weeks ago47 min
Episode 436 - The Seven Deadly Sins in Your Marriage
Most of us have heard of the seven deadly sins, but I'd never heard them reframed quite like this. In this episode, I dig into Elizabeth Oldfield's idea that these old sins aren't really about morality checklists, they're about disconnection, and I bring that lens straight into marriage and the bedroom. The part I can't stop thinking about is a mistranslation in Matthew 5 that's convinced a lot of good, married people they should feel ashamed just for wanting their own spouse. I also discuss how President Benson's "Beware of Pride" talk works within Oldfield's work, and for every pattern that pulls you apart, I give you what actually brings you back together. I invite you to listen and see if anything makes you stop and think about your own relationship. You might be surprised. Here are the questions for this week's episode. Here is the link to the book I talk about, Fully Alive.
- Aug 21, 202632 min
Episode 435 - The Paradoxes Running Your Sex Life
Most of the fights in your marriage aren't problems to solve. They're paradoxes, and we get stuck the moment we try to pick a side instead of accepting both. In this episode, I dig into why our faith is built floor to ceiling on paradoxes, why the Stockdale Paradox (brutal honesty plus unshakable faith) separates couples who heal from couples who quietly erode, and why even the word "cleave" asks you to cling and stand apart at the same time. I share how my clients broke a three-year standoff not by resolving their paradox but by stepping into the middle of it. If you've been waiting for the tension in your marriage to disappear before things get good, this one's for you.
- Aug 14, 202631 min
Episode 434 - Emotional Safety: The Foundation Your Marriage and Sex Life Are Built On
What if the problem in your sex life isn't really about sex at all? In this episode, I'm talking about emotional safety and the powerful role it plays in both your marriage and your sexual relationship. We'll look at the patterns that slowly break down emotional safety, including criticism, defensiveness, dismissal, and shame, as well as what both partners can do to rebuild trust and connection. I'll also help you recognize when you may be contributing to an emotionally unsafe environment and show you how curiosity, accountability, repair, and consistency can begin to change those patterns. Because the deepest intimacy happens when both partners feel safe enough to be fully known.
- Aug 7, 202622 min
Episode 433 - Arousal Without an Agenda
Have you ever stopped yourself from feeling close to your spouse because you were worried about where it might lead? In this episode, I explore why arousal, or what the ancient Greeks called Eros, is about so much more than sex. I talk about how learning to experience desire without pressure or expectation can create deeper trust, stronger emotional connection, and a more vibrant marriage. If you've ever felt like affection automatically comes with an agenda, this episode will help you discover how allowing Eros to simply exist can transform both your relationship and your intimate connection.
- Jul 31, 202630 min
Episode 432 – The Natural Man Was Never About Your Sexuality
In this final episode of my five-part series, I challenge the idea that our sexuality is the "natural man" and offer a new framework for understanding what King Benjamin was really teaching in Mosiah 3:19. Together, we'll explore how ego, not desire, is often what keeps us disconnected from God and from our spouse, and how awareness, agency, and alignment can transform our relationships. If you've been following this series, this episode brings everything together into a hopeful path forward. If you're just joining us, I encourage you to go back and listen to the first four episodes to fully understand the journey and how these ideas build on one another. You can find those first four episodes here: 428, 429, 430, 431.
About Sex for Saints
As a Certified Sex & Marriage Coach, and a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, Amanda Louder helps conservative Christian women love their sex life! In this podcast, Amanda helps women embrace their sexuality so that they can become the woman they were created to be. She teaches you how to integrate sexuality into your marriage in a loving and healthy way, get rid of the drama and negative emotions around sex in your marriage, and develop a better relationship to yourself, your spouse, and your sexuality.
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