
What I Discussed With Eric M. Resnick...- Why the swipe apps trained women to chase the dopamine hit of a match, and stopped everyone from looking at who they were actually matching with- The one word Eric uses for Tinder and Bumble, and why he calls them exactly that- What ChatGPT admitted to Eric, in its own words, about why it's bad at writing dating profiles- Why my own list of dealbreakers might be doing more damage than the men on it- The reason women over 50 still hesitate to message first, and why Eric says the men who get put off by it were never worth the risk- What dating apps actually do to your visibility if you don't log in for two weeks- Why a naked photo without a face has no value, and a naked photo with a face is a liability- What made my late partner Bob's Tinder profile the most authentic one Eric's ever heard described to himChapters00:00 – Sponsor spotlight: OhMiBod https://www.ohmibod.com/00:20 – Introducing dating profile veteran Eric Resnick to tackle why most online bios fall completely flat.02:17 – Looking back at how online dating evolved from early matchmakers to addictive swipe culture.04:40 – The brutal swipe statistics between men and women that broke app dynamics.05:40 – How meeting his wife on a niche site proves there really is someone out there for everyone.06:14 – Reflecting on early dial-up dating sites and the modern shift toward casual hookup apps.08:04 – Why incognito mode is a total game-changer for women navigating overwhelming inboxes.09:07 – The biggest profile writing traps men fall into when trying to sell themselves.10:05 – Why letting AI tools like ChatGPT write your dating bio completely kills authentic chemistry.12:10 – Sponsor spotlight: GITM Playbook.12:45 – The hidden danger of listing red flags and past relationship baggage on your profile.15:40 – The hard truth about why dating success comes down to who you choose, not who chooses you.17:00 – Why making the first move as a woman over 50 is an empowering shortcut.18:03 – How dating app algorithms track daily logins and quietly lower your visibility.20:50 – Why dystopian AI avatars and paid profile boosts keep daters hooked on the screen.22:50 – Turning your profile into an authentic conversation starter instead of an empty checklist.26:23 – Why a great dating profile acts as a window into your world rather than a sales pitch.28:55 – The blunt truth about unsolicited photos and the golden rules of photo etiquette.31:30 – Suzanne and Eric wrap up with key strategies for showing up authentically and finding connection.Show NotesI've been on dating apps since 2000, same as my guest this week. So when Eric Resnick, founder of ProfileHelper.com, told me he's read more than 40,000 dating profiles and consulted for the platforms themselves, I knew this was going to be a conversation I couldn't have with almost anyone else.We started with how different online dating looked in 2000, back when it was Match.com and dial-up modems, and how Tinder changed everything the moment it made swiping possible without writing a word. Eric calls swipe apps a dopamine slot machine, and he means it literally: they train you to chase the feeling of a match, not the person behind it.Then things got personal. I admitted my own profile has a list on it. Bad teeth, beer bellies, things I don't want. Eric didn't let me off easy. He explained exactly what that list has been doing to the men who read it, and why the healthiest ones see it as a red flag before they've even said hello.We also got into why AI can't write a profile that means anything, because AI aims for the middle, and if you're acceptable to everyone, you're not special to anyone. And we talked about the algorithms themselves, the visibility rankings, the fear of missing out tricks, and why Eric thinks the newest AI matching features are the most dystopian thing he's seen yet.This one runs a little short because I had to get to the theatre. Eric's already agreed to come back for a whole episode on photos.Listen, learn and enjoy.Key Takeaways- Swipe apps like Tinder and Bumble train people to chase matches, not connection. Eric calls them a dopamine slot machine.- Lists of what you don't want in a profile read as unresolved baggage. Healthy matches see it as a red flag, not a filter.- AI-written profiles fail because AI aims for the widest possible appeal, and being acceptable to everyone means being memorable to no one.- Success on a dating app comes down to who you choose, not who chooses you, on
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