
On this episode of #mensexpleasure, Pamela Madsen, a U.S.-based sex educator specializing in hands-on somatic education, discusses eroticism as full-body passion rather than orgasm-focused performance. We explore how goal-oriented “purpose” messaging can turn sex into pressure around erections, penetration, and climax, while many women primarily want attention, eye contact, and presence. We distinguish quick, private masturbation habits from partnered intimacy and suggest building “erotic endurance” through non-genital touch like massage, slowing down even more, and starting connection before the bedroom.Key Points:02:59 Purpose Versus Pleasure08:02 Presence And Attention10:45 Masturbation Habits And Porn18:58 Erotic Endurance Mindset28:46 Play As A Portal30:49 Roleplay And Avatars33:50 Bringing Intention Back
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#283 From Performance to Presence: Men’s Sexual Confidence and Initiation (with Brett Matthews)

#282 Orgasmic Intimacy: Heart-Connected Sex, Pleasure, and Practical Skills (with Susan Bratton)

#281 Integrating Men’s Health Coaching: TRT, Stress, and Normalizing Sexual Performance Conversations (with Ali Gilbert)

#280 Stop Having Fear-Based Sex (with Caitlin V)
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