Human School

How to Find Peace When a Relationship Can't Be Fixed with Matthias Barker (Live from the Transform Trauma Conference)

September 30, 2026·1h 5m
Episode Description from the Publisher

What happens when the mental health expert becomes the one navigating a family crisis? In this deep and deeply personal conversation, therapist and author Matthias Barker sits down with Miles at the Transform Trauma Conference –– Europe’s largest mental health and wellness conference in Oxford, England –– to open up about his own journey through family estrangement, grief, and reconciliation.  Together, they break down the real-world stuff we all deal with: why healing must come before forgiveness, the difference between setting a healthy boundary and running away, the traps of modern pop psychology, and what it actually takes to find "peace with what's possible." Whether you're a mental health professional or just trying to navigate your own family system, this conversation offers real tools for real life.Learn more about Transform Trauma and other Master’s Events: https://mastersevents.com/ Are you unfurling your own stories around family, trauma, and mental health? Onsite offers transformational experiences to help you live the life you deserve. Learn more: https://hubs.la/Q04xQ6_l0  Episode Chapters: 00:00 - Welcome to Human School... LIVE!01:45 - Meet Matthias Barker: From drama kid to building a platform05:00 - The Family Crisis: Addiction, divorce, and estrangement07:00 - Learning from Grief Expert David Kessler11:00 - The Intersection of Trauma and Grief in Family Conflict15:30 - Peace with What’s Possible: Rethinking reconciliation26:30 - The Research on Contempt and Emotional Abuse31:30 - Boundaries vs. Avoidance: When to engage and when to step back39:30 - The Danger of Pop Psychology and Weaponized Therapy Speak49:30 - The Trap of Rumination vs. True Psychological Healing55:30 - The Hardest and Most Meaningful Parts of Being a HelperStay connected to Human School Substack: https://hubs.ly/Q04xQ71f0 Miles on Instagram: https://hubs.ly/Q04xQ6Y40 Human School on Instagram: https://hubs.ly/Q04xQ71f0 Onsite: https://hubs.la/Q04xQ6_l0

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