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by Josh + Christi Straub
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- 2 weeks ago31 min
Why Your Communication Type Matters with Jason VanRuler
Have you ever had a conversation with a loved one go in a completely different direction than what you saw coming? Your intention was there, but the way your loved one received it was nothing in the way you intended it? Our good friend, Jason VanRuler, started to see this pattern in many of the people he had come into therapy. Conversations between people -- where everything was at stake -- and the intentions were there, but someone inevitably walked away feeling hurt, unseen, or even abandoning the relationship altogether. What one person meant isn’t what the other person heard. So Jason asked himself, “Why does it sometimes land well, and other times not?”The more research he did, the more he learned predictable patterns that led to 5 primary communication types: Peace, Advocate, Thinking, Harbor, and Spark. Each one with a strength and each one with an opportunity. Not only that, each person has their own primary and secondary type. In this episode, Jason unveils each type, how we develop our own, and how we can better understand how our spouse, kids, and loved ones communicate with us. We get into marital dynamics and why we usually marry someone with similar secondary type, but the trouble that can arise when we realize we don’t have the same primary one. We also talk about how knowing the types can help us communicate at a deeper level with our kids. Time Stamps: 0:00 Introduction 1:18 Jason VanRuler joins the show!4:34 Why these communication types matters 6:00 Jason introduces the 5 PATHS of communication11:16 Where our personal communication style comes from 14:05 Strengths and weaknesses of each communication type 20:20 The communication types in our children and how we give what we didn’t get25:05 How different communication types serve us in marriage Show Notes: Get Jason’s new book Discovering Your Communication Type: The 5 Paths to Deeper Connections and Stronger Relationships: https://amzn.to/4sZzbwc Check out Jason’s website: www.jasonvr.comReserve your seat for Tender & Fierce Fall Cohort beginning August 17, 2026: https://www.famousathome.com/offers/V75F6bY2Looking for a marriage intensive with Famous at Home? Apply now. https://www.famousathome.com/coaching Men, sign up for the Living Legacy Cohort:https://www.famousathome.com/menscoaching Sign up for our email list and Famous at Home Starter Bundle: https://www.famousathome.com/newsletter Download NONAH's single Find My Way Home by clicking here: https://bellpartners.ffm.to/findmywayhome
- Apr 15, 202636 min
Calling Out Purpose in Your Children
Quick note: We announced the Tender and Fierce fall cohort. See show notes below. What’s the first question we ask our kids in kindergarten? “What do you want to BE when you grow up?” We do our children a disservice by asking this question because the very nature of the phrase implies that what you DO is who you are. What about for ourselves as adults? What does it means to live in “fullness of life,” even when our circumstances might not match our heart’s desire? Perhaps Teresa of Avila held a clue to this mystery when she said, “God is among the pots and the pans.” In this episode, Josh and Christi define what we mean by the word “purpose” and also identify other flaws of our modern cultural understanding of purpose and how it influences how we shepherd the hearts of our kids. One question to consider, “Is our understanding of purpose, especially when raising our children, filtered through a biblical lens?” In other words, who is God calling our children to “become?”Josh and Christi also discuss Christi’s own “mid-life” crisis, the many layers of purpose, what the Bible tells us about meaning, and how we squelch our children’s desire for purpose even in early childhood. Time Stamps:0:00 Introduction1:40 Welcome to our own mid-life crisis4:40 Tender & Fierce fall cohort announcement!5:40 Christi’s mid-life crisis and rethinking what “purpose” really is13:00 The layers of purpose and helping our children find theirs20:00 Ecclesiastes and the discovery of meaning23:20 Finding “fullness of life” no matter your life circumstances or current occupation / role29:07 What keeps us from living in purpose33:00 What multiplication and expansion of our purpose actually means Show Notes: Reserve your seat for Tender & Fierce Fall Cohort beginning August 17, 2026: https://www.famousathome.com/offers/V75F6bY2 Looking for a marriage intensive with Famous at Home? Apply now. https://www.famousathome.com/coaching Men, sign up for the Living Legacy Cohort:https://www.famousathome.com/menscoaching Sign up for our email list and Famous at Home Starter Bundle: https://www.famousathome.com/newsletter Download the Famous at Home app from Apple, click here. https://apps.apple.com/us/app/famous-at-home/id6502221394 Download the Famous at Home app from Google Play, click here. https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.kj2147486660.app2&hl=en_US Download NONAH's single Find My Way Home by clicking here: https://bellpartners.ffm.to/findmywayhome
- Mar 25, 202637 min
Raising Confident, Resourceful, and Resilient Kids
We all want our kids to be confident, resourceful, and to know what they’re good at. The trouble is that we make two big mistakes as parents: We either don’t give them enough challenge, or we burn them out with too much. Do your kids know that they have what it takes to overcome struggle? Do they feel confident in knowing what to do when it comes to life skills and everyday tasks like cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, or taking care of animals? Do they know what they’re good at and have a healthy sense of what to do with things they’re not good at? We call this resourcefulness, and it’s one of the most important traits to cultivate in our kids. What is resourcefulness? How do we offer a healthy dose of both support and challenge to help our kids build resilience? What do you do when you see things in your kids they don’t see in themselves? These are the questions we tackle in this episode. Time Stamps:0:00 Introduction1:24 What resourcefulness is and the two extremes we tend to take as parents7:40 The good and hard of giving children responsibility12:03 Giving kids support while offering challenge19:38 How to know if you’ve over-supported or over-challenged24:15 When you see things in your kids they don’t see in themselves30:00 When you push beyond what you think you’re capable of Show Notes:Get 10 Days of the Easter Story: A Family Experience Through the Feelings of Holy Weekhttps://amzn.to/4lpPGQf Join our KidsRQ Community: www.kidsrq.com Looking for a marriage intensive with Famous at Home? Apply now. https://www.famousathome.com/coaching Men, sign up for the Living Legacy Cohort:https://www.famousathome.com/menscoaching Sign up for our email list and Famous at Home Starter Bundle: https://www.famousathome.com/newsletter Download the Famous at Home app from Apple, click here. https://apps.apple.com/us/app/famous-at-home/id6502221394 Download the Famous at Home app from Google Play, click here. https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.kj2147486660.app2&hl=en_US Download NONAH's single Find My Way Home by clicking here: https://bellpartners.ffm.to/findmywayhome
- Mar 20, 202648 min
The Feeling of Joy: Why it Scares us + How to Pass it on
Get ready for the early episode pivot in this one, folks. Talking about their marriage a few minutes into recording, Josh and Christi had a moment that sent them spiraling into laughter. The atmosphere shifted, so they shifted with it. And the result? A conversation about joy! In this episode, Josh and Christi talk about why joy can be so difficult to feel. “We’re actually scared of joy,” Christi says. “It is such an intense emotion that our bodies feel under threat.” Christi goes on to say, “The feeling of joy is so big that you can’t start at 95%, you have to begin by micro-dosing it at about 5%.”But feel it we must. The Bible says that the joy of the Lord is our strength (Nehemiah 8:10). If it strengthens us, it must be dangerous for darkness. No wonder it takes courage to feel it. Like anything else, joy is caught, not taught. Josh and Christi talk about how to overcome the fear, shift the atmosphere, and pass joy onto our kids. Time Stamps:0:00 Introduction1:24 10 Days of the Easter Story2:53 Josh & Christi’s wedding story5:55 The unexpected pivot into joy7:30 Shifting the spiritual atmosphere for joy13:10 Left brain knowledge of versus right brain experience of joy17:52 How joy is birthed within us21:16 God is a joyful God28:14 Why we’re afraid of joy31:30 How to micro-dose moments of joy in your life34:01 Practical ways to experience joy and pass it onto your kids42:55 Ways to make joy not feel threatening Show Notes:Get 10 Days of the Easter Story: A Family Experience Through the Feelings of Holy Weekhttps://amzn.to/4lpPGQf Looking for a marriage intensive with Famous at Home? Apply now. https://www.famousathome.com/coaching Men, sign up for the Living Legacy Cohort:https://www.famousathome.com/menscoaching Sign up for our email list and Famous at Home Starter Bundle: https://www.famousathome.com/newsletter Download the Famous at Home app from Apple, click here. https://apps.apple.com/us/app/famous-at-home/id6502221394 Download the Famous at Home app from Google Play, click here. https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.kj2147486660.app2&hl=en_US Download NONAH's single Find My Way Home by clicking here: https://bellpartners.ffm.to/findmywayhome
- Mar 11, 202636 min
Inner Child Parts, Epigenetic Transmission, and Parenting
Have you felt yourself revert back to a child in the way you react to your kids, or a particular situation?Watching from the sideline, Josh recently had a moment where his inner child wounds collided with the reality of the his son’s experience on the soccer field. When we come face-to-face with the dissonance between the way we REACT, and the way we want to ACT, something deeper is often at play. Becoming mindful of those moments, and how we respond to them, influences what we pass onto our kids. In this episode, Josh & Christi talk about how to identify an unhealed inner child “part” of yourself, give examples of redeemed and unhealed epigenetic transmission, and provide a beautiful example of how Jesus meets us right where we are. Time Stamps:0:00 Introduction1:15 The messages we picked up in childhood in order to fit in6:15 How to identify an unhealed inner child “part” of yourself9:13 Examples of epigenetic transmission of unresolved inner child pain17:37 The motivation of our parental decisions20:30 Disappointment, condemnation, and the feelings of Holy Week28:56 How Jesus’ restoration of Peter is for all of us Show Notes:Easter is coming up! Get 10 Days of the Easter Story: A Family Experience Through the Feelings of Holy Weekhttps://amzn.to/4lpPGQf Interested in our Spring Love Your Marriage Cohort? Apply now. Starts March 30. https://www.famousathome.com/loveyourmarriage Looking for a marriage intensive with Famous at Home? Apply now. https://www.famousathome.com/coaching Men, sign up for the Living Legacy Cohort:https://www.famousathome.com/menscoaching Sign up for our email list and Famous at Home Starter Bundle: https://www.famousathome.com/newsletter Download NONAH's single Find My Way Home by clicking here: https://bellpartners.ffm.to/findmywayhome
- Mar 4, 202631 min
Why Emotional Safety is the Bedrock of Parenting
In this episode, we lay the foundation for what really matters most when it comes to raising Gen Alpha kids—emotional safety. It’s also the beginning of how we got started with Famous at Home — discovering the power of, and talking about how to cultivate, a posture of emotional safety in our homes for our kids.As we continue season 8 on Parenting Gen Alpha, we define what emotional safety is and why it matters for getting every outcome we desire in our kids. We also talk about the four walls of parenting, the importance of reparenting our own inner child, and why emotional safety is so important to who our kids are becoming. Time Stamps:0:00 Introduction and insight into Josh and Christi’s current day-to-day as parents3:20 Setting the stage for today's topic 7:21 What emotional safety is and why it matters11:13 Being able to bring the fullness of who you are to the relationship13:50 Support and challenge in parenting16:55 Reparenting our own inner child21:02 Leading in grace and following in truth25:49 Emotional safety and the need for communityShow Notes:Get Safe House: How Emotional Safety is the Key to Raising Kids Who Live, Love, and Lead Well:https://amzn.to/4rc52c9 Ladies, sign up here for Spring Tender & Fierce Cohort! https://www.famousathome.com/tenderandfierce Interested in our Spring Love Your Marriage Cohort? Apply now. Starts March 30. https://www.famousathome.com/loveyourmarriage Looking for a marriage intensive with Famous at Home? Apply now. https://www.famousathome.com/coaching Men, sign up for the Living Legacy Cohort:https://www.famousathome.com/menscoaching Sign up for our email list and Famous at Home Starter Bundle: https://www.famousathome.com/newsletter Download NONAH's single Find My Way Home by clicking here: https://bellpartners.ffm.to/findmywayhome
- Feb 25, 202642 min
The One Factor For Raising Resilient Kids
One of the most intriguing, humbling, and challenging aspects of being a parent is how our kids mirror who WE are. And what’s really difficult are the societal — or cultural — norms shaping who we are as humans. Who are we becoming as adults?How are the decisions we make shaping our kids?Do our unrealized emotions influence how resilient our kids are becoming? As we continue our series on Raising Gen Alpha Kids, these are questions Dr. Josh and Christi address. Some highlights include: What it means to “choose your hard”How loneliness becomes a byproduct of self-protectionHow silence plays itself out in marriage and the cost it has on our kidsWhat if you’re exhausted and can’t choose the hard thing?The joy and “hard” of helping our kids build resilienceTime Stamps:0:00 Introduction1:28 Ways to go deeper7:30 Choosing your hard11:40 Loneliness and the environment of the home16:19 How loneliness becomes a byproduct of our self-protection20:03 How silence plays itself out in marriage and the cost it has on our kids23:10 What if you’re exhausted and can’t choose the hard thing?27:48 Choosing a different kind of “hard”32:41 The joy and “hard” of helping our kids build resilience Show Notes:Ladies, sign up here for Spring Tender & Fierce Cohort! https://www.famousathome.com/tenderandfierce Interested in our Spring Love Your Marriage Cohort? Apply now. Starts March 30. https://www.famousathome.com/loveyourmarriage Looking for a marriage intensive with Famous at Home? Apply now. https://www.famousathome.com/coaching Men, sign up for the Living Legacy Cohort:https://www.famousathome.com/menscoaching Sign up for our email list and Famous at Home Starter Bundle: https://www.famousathome.com/newsletter Download the Famous at Home app from Apple, click here. https://apps.apple.com/us/app/famous-at-home/id6502221394 Download the Famous at Home app from Google Play, click here. https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.kj2147486660.app2&hl=en_US Download NONAH's single Find My Way Home by clicking here: https://bellpartners.ffm.to/findmywayhome
- Feb 18, 202650 min
The Spiritual and Emotional Influence of Parental Fear
The stats of anxiety, depression, and stress on Gen Z (ages 14-28) are scary and higher than ever before. That’s not hyperbole. What have been the cultural, familial, and individual influences at work, and what can parents of Gen Alpha (ages 0-13) learn from where we find ourselves? We believe that parents hold the keys to influencing the next generation. And there is much more hope than might appear at the surface. But the way through is by first addressing what may be our greatest adversary: Our own parental fears. In this episode, we ask the question, “Why are we doing what we’re doing as families?” We address issues like the self-fulfilling prophecy, the role of epigenetics in child outcomes, and the spiritual laws that influence our decisions. Time Stamps:0:00 Introduction1:03 Christi and Josh introduce a NEW season5:40 The mental health of Gen Z9:57 Parenting and mental health16:20 The effects of the decisions we make as parents and addressing parental fears25:30 Spiritual laws that influence our parenting31:00 Running into our fears and the hope of being a parent today35:25 Conscious and unconscious choices we make as parents40:00 How fear-based narratives influence our parenting44:34 What is God’s role in how you parent? Show Notes:Ladies, sign up here for Spring Tender & Fierce Cohort! https://www.famousathome.com/tenderandfierce Interested in our Spring Love Your Marriage Cohort? Apply now. https://www.famousathome.com/loveyourmarriage Looking for a marriage intensive with Famous at Home? Apply now. https://www.famousathome.com/coaching Men, sign up for the Living Legacy Cohort:https://www.famousathome.com/menscoachingSubscribe to Dr. Josh's Substack: https://substack.com/@drjoshuastraub Download the Famous at Home app from Apple, click here. https://apps.apple.com/us/app/famous-at-home/id6502221394 Download the Famous at Home app from Google Play, click here. https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.kj2147486660.app2&hl=en_US Sign up for our email list and Famous at Home Starter Bundle: https://www.famousathome.com/newsletter Download NONAH's single Find My Way Home by clicking here: https://bellpartners.ffm.to/findmywayhome
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About Famous at Home
We all long to put our families center stage. Yet, in a world that competes for our time, attention, and identity, we often give our family the leftovers instead of our full, undivided hearts. Welcome to the Famous at Home podcast, with marriage and leadership coaches, Dr. Josh and Christi Straub. With a realistic, grace-filled look at the struggles families face, the Famous at Home podcast is like having a cup of coffee with authentic friends who just “get you,” yet with the practical and life-changing coaching strategies Josh and Christi use to help spouses, parents, and leaders stay emotionally engaged and connected to their biggest fans. With topics designed to help you set healthy rhythms between work and home, be fully present with your kids, and build a rock-solid marriage, the Famous at Home podcast will awaken your own heart and revive your family.Because we all need to find our way back home.
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