The Father Wound: Masculinity, Suppressed Emotion, and Reparenting Yourself | Ep. 89

Nikolas and Michael get personal about masculinity and the father wound: how boys are quietly taught to suppress emotion, the difference between inheriting a parent's fear and reacting against it, and what it takes to change a pattern carried since childhood. They talk about parenting the way they wish they had been parented, loving a child for who they are rather than what they do, and the hard question of whether a relational wound can be completed without the parent. It ends on blame, grief, and the good memories worth holding onto.00:00 Intro00:45 Masculinity and the father wound02:54 Looking at the father relationship for the first time06:05 How boys get taught to suppress emotion10:30 Masculinity as a denial of "soft" qualities13:13 How suppression is passed down16:40 Transmission, reaction, and the "shy kid" label20:31 It took suffering and awareness to change23:03 Parenting as a second-time father26:57 Love for who you are vs what you do: the shame wound31:47 Relational wounds and relational repair34:23 Safety, TRE, and reparenting yourself36:44 Can you complete a father wound without the father?39:54 Letting go of blame43:23 Grieving what you did not get46:28 Wrap-up