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The Monet Noctaris Podcast: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Monet Noctaris
The Monet Noctaris Podcast is for those who can no longer pretend the old world makes sense.Through grounded spiritual insight, personal story, and cultural disentanglement, Monet explores what happens when the systems, identities, relationships, and beliefs that once held us begin to break apart.This is a podcast about disillusionment as initiation, sovereignty as embodiment, and the slow, often messy process of becoming coherent in a world built to keep us fragmented.For the ones waking up from performance, programming, spiritual bypassing, self-abandonment, and inherited survival patterns — welcome. There is a way through.www.monetnoctaris.com
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- 4 days ago43 min
24. Plot Twists & Sovereign Love
A dear pet’s recovery. An unexpected goodbye. A dream job that disappeared before onboarding was even over. And a message from someone I never expected to hear from again. Beloved, the past couple of weeks have been a lot. In this episode, I’m sharing the relief of Pom Pom’s recovery, the heartbreak of losing Mochi, and the shock of having an entire sales department eliminated just two weeks into my new role. Then comes the biggest plot twist: a heartfelt apology from the person who once disappeared from my life—and an unexpected opportunity to reconnect on sovereign terms. That reunion opens a deeper conversation about accountability, loving someone without rescuing them, and allowing a connection to unfold without deciding in advance what it has to become. I also explore why relationship anarchy resonates with me, what sovereignty means within different relationship structures, and how I’m learning to choose honesty, consent, and connection while making room for uncertainty. What might love look like if we gave ourselves permission to choose it in a way that truly fits?
- 2 weeks ago6 min
23. Life Update: Holding Hope for Pom Pom & Welcoming a New Chapter
A little life update, beloveds. This week has held both something really hard and something really good: my sweet, special needs kitty Pom Pom is in the hospital, and I’ve started a new full-time remote job after a long and frustrating search. I’m sharing what I've been up to, what this new chapter means for me and my family, and how financial stability will give this platform room to evolve without the pressure for it to provide. For this week, I’m taking a breather to focus on what's immediately in front of me. Thank you for being here. Much love. 💜
- Oct 9, 202652 min
22. How to Stop Abandoning Yourself
Who do you get to become when you no longer have to ask permission to be yourself? This episode takes the scenic route through Halloween nostalgia, Spice Girls, Sailor Moon, and a few personal ghost stories—including a chatty party guest named Edward and a resident “Grandpa” who apparently has opinions about my television choices. Somewhere between the ghosts and the costumes, we get into what it means to start enjoying life again after spending so long just trying to survive it. I share how I’m rediscovering play, friendship, and self-expression while rebuilding my life—and the question I’m using to make more honest choices: “How would I feel about this if I were not lying to myself?” From relationships to job opportunities, we explore the subtle ways we talk ourselves into things we already know feel wrong, the discomfort of honoring our own answers, and why being able to tolerate something doesn’t mean we have to choose it. A little spooky, a little spicy, and a conversation about becoming more yourself—and finding people who celebrate you for it. www.monetnoctaris.com Follow me on Instagram: @monetnoctaris
- Oct 2, 202650 min
21. Erotic Sovereignty: From Being Chosen to Choosing
Being desired can feel like validation. But when you’ve learned to organize your life around being chosen, it can also feel like an obligation. Where, in all of that, do you get to ask what you actually want? In this episode, I share my own messy, sometimes funny journey through sexual shame, religious control, dating after leaving my marriage, and the realization that having sexual knowledge and experience didn’t mean I knew how to stay loyal to myself. We explore erotic sovereignty, inner consent, and what changes when you can express a preference, decline an invitation, or change your mind without sacrificing yourself to keep someone interested. From a year of celibacy to experiencing intimacy where my boundaries are respected, this is a conversation about making room for your own yes, no, and maybe—and allowing them to matter. Your body belongs to you. Someone else’s desire doesn’t create a debt. Content note: Includes discussion of sexual trauma, coercion, religious shame, and personal sexual experiences, without graphic, violent, or heavy detail. I tried to keep things light. www.monetnoctaris.com Follow me on Instagram
- Sep 25, 202639 min
20. You Can Love Them and Still Leave
What do you do when you love someone, but the relationship is hurting you? In this episode, I talk about one of the hardest parts of leaving: accepting that the loving version of someone you’ve seen may not be the version they can consistently be. I share how I spent years trying to explain my needs, teach my ex-husband how to treat me, and solve a relationship I couldn’t fix on my own. We’ll talk about the pull of someone’s potential, the grief that comes with accepting what they’ve shown you, and why setting a boundary or walking away doesn’t require you to stop loving them first. Sometimes choosing yourself begins with letting reality be true. www.monetnoctaris.com Follow me on Instagram
- Sep 18, 202653 min
19. When Dysregulation Is Telling You the Truth
What if your nervous system isn’t malfunctioning? What if it’s responding appropriately to an environment that isn't safe? In this episode, I talk about what happened when nervous system regulation became one more way I was taught to blame myself for the effects of living in a psychologically abusive relationship. I was constantly walking on eggshells, anticipating anger, making myself smaller, and trying to regulate my way into tolerating an environment that was actively harming me. Then I left—and the anxiety disorder I thought I had largely disappeared. We’ll talk about how therapy language, attachment theory, and somatic tools can be weaponized by unsafe people; why regulation practices cannot compensate for chronic exposure to harm; and how the body begins to change when it finally experiences safety. I also share what it has been like to have new experiences with a safe person—and to realize that I don’t have to brace for traffic, a disappointing meal, or someone else’s emotional reaction. Sometimes healing happens through tools. Sometimes it happens because you leave. And sometimes it happens when your body is finally shown that something else is possible. Plus, a personal update on reclaiming the title of life coach, refining the direction of this platform, and helping women rebuild lives that truly belong to them. www.monetnoctaris.com
- Sep 11, 202640 min
18. You Evolved. Did Your Self-Concept?
What happens when your life begins to change, but you’re still carrying beliefs built for an earlier version of you? In this episode, I’m reflecting on the anniversary of a painful ending, the radical acceptance that finally allowed me to seal that door, and the life that became possible once I stopped yearning for a ghost. I also share the self-concept work I’ve returned to as I approach a new professional threshold—and why entering a new relationship, opportunity, or chapter often requires us to update what we believe about ourselves. We’ll talk about learning to observe your thoughts instead of automatically treating them as truth, identifying the voices and conditioning beneath your beliefs, and becoming someone who can actually receive the love, respect, success, and possibility she says she wants. Because sovereignty isn’t only about what you choose externally. It begins with recognizing that your beliefs about yourself are optional. I’ll leave you with a practical exercise for turning the lights on inside your own house: What do you currently believe about yourself? Where did those beliefs come from? And are they still creating the life you want? www.monetnoctaris.com
- Sep 4, 202644 min
17. Relational Sovereignty: I Am Me, You Are You, We Choose
What would our relationships look like if they were built on choice rather than obligation? In this episode, I explore relational sovereignty: the practice of belonging to yourself while remaining deeply connected to the people you love. I talk about the invisible agreements that keep us sacrificing, rescuing, over-functioning, and abandoning ourselves—and how relationships become distorted when care is treated as a debt that must eventually be repaid. Drawing from my experiences with marriage, divorce, family, and lifelong friendship, I explore what happens when one person is committed to self-awareness while the other is committed to preserving their self-image. We talk about releasing the responsibility to regulate or rescue other adults, choosing how much access someone receives to you, and allowing people to be disappointed—or even misunderstand you—without surrendering your truth to correct their version of the story. Sovereign relationships don’t require us to merge, keep score, or continually prove our love. They allow us to say: I am me. You are you. We are both free—and we choose. www.monetnoctaris.com
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About The Monet Noctaris Podcast
The Monet Noctaris Podcast is for those who can no longer pretend the old world makes sense.Through grounded spiritual insight, personal story, and cultural disentanglement, Monet explores what happens when the systems, identities, relationships, and beliefs that once held us begin to break apart.This is a podcast about disillusionment as initiation, sovereignty as embodiment, and the slow, often messy process of becoming coherent in a world built to keep us fragmented.For the ones waking up from performance, programming, spiritual bypassing, self-abandonment, and inherited survival patterns — welcome. There is a way through.www.monetnoctaris.com
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