The Feminist Dating Show

278. Stop Demoting Yourself to the "Best Friend" Role

August 18, 2026·16 min
Episode Description from the Publisher

Here are 3 signs you're demoting yourself to the "best friend" role in love, friendship, and work... You're the designated listener in your friendships, always the one reaching out first, making the plans, overgiving and caretaking. In dating, you're hesitating to ask for what you want for fear of scaring them off, settling for good enough or settling for inaction. At work, you're logging in past 9p.m., trying to fulfill your coworkers' needs because you fear that shutting down your computer will let people down and mean you're not seen as the go-to person. It's exhausting to demote yourself to the "best friend" role. And it's time for your main character era. This week's episode is about the skill set that will take you from "best friend" to main character. Main character energy isn't something you're born with. It's learnable. In this episode, you'll learn the exact three-part framework Lily uses in her own life and teaches her clients to finally stop shrinking and start taking up space in your dating life, your friendships, and your work. Inside episode 278, you'll lear: ■ The three signs you've been demoting yourself to the best friend role across dating, friendship, and work ■ The three-part skill set that makes up main character energy: permission, self-trust, and massive messy action ■ How to build self trust (even if you've never had it before) ■ What it actually means to shoot your shot unapologetically in every area of your life   Ready to step into your main character era? Join Lily's free live training, Quit Being the Best Friend, on September 15th to learn how to break free from people-pleasing and finally get what you want in love, friendship, and work. Sign up: https://datebrazen.com/best-friend   Work with Lily: ■ Get the book, Thank You, More Please: https://datebrazen.com/book ■ Join the Main Character Dating waitlist: https://datebrazen.com/dating ■ Download my free Essence-Based Preferences Creation Guide: https://datebrazen.com/workbook ■ Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datebrazen/ ■ Follow me on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@datebrazen ■ Follow me on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DateBrazen

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