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The Big Drink Rethink: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Anna Donaghey
Anna explores our shifting drinking culture by talking to the people rethinking and reshaping it. With the trademark lightness and non-judgement that define her as an Alcohol Mindset Coach, she invites us to consider our own perspectives, as she shares the knowledge, insights and tools that can help us make our own good, healthy life choices.
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- 4 days ago16 min
Ep 141: ‘I Need Alcohol To Cope’. Says Who?
What if reaching for a drink when life feels overwhelming isn’t actually helping you cope, but is instead blocking your real resilience? In this solo episode, Anna Donaghey unpacks the powerful belief that “alcohol helps me cope” and why it might be time to rethink it.Anna walks listeners through how our beliefs drive our thoughts and behaviours, using real-life examples and her own experience during maternity leave, to break down the difference between numbing and coping.You’ll learn how to identify the underlying beliefs fueling your urge to drink when things get tough, why numbing with alcohol doesn’t actually resolve hard feelings and the cultural scripts and common myths that keep us reaching for alcohol. If you’ve ever felt like you “need” a drink to get through tough times or want to trust yourself to deal with life’s challenges without alcohol, this episode is for you. Check out the free worksheet and resources mentioned at https://www.thebigdrinkrethink.com/resources to continue your exploration.Highlights: 00:00 Introduction 01:34 How beliefs drive drinking: breaking down the behaviour-thought-belief chain 02:36 The “alcohol helps me cope” belief and why it’s so fundamental 04:20 Distinguishing between drinking for crisis vs. drinking for everyday discomfort 07:17 Alcohol as the UK’s “favourite coping mechanism” 10:33 Evidence: Alcohol worsens depression, anxiety, and stress over time 12:54 Practical tool: Name the hard thing out loud or write it down 14:58 Reflection exercise: “I don’t think I could cope with ___ without a drink.” Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/The Thirsty For More Mindset Lab is Anna’s ‘inner circle’ - a calm, thoughtful space where conversations continue, patterns are explored, and things begin to make sense. Find out more at: https://thirstyformore.substack.com/If you appreciate the podcast and would like to show a bit of love, you can donate the cost of a coffee here. It helps support the time and care that goes into making the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/bigdrinkrethinkAbout the host Anna:Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.Connect with Anna:Website: thebigdrinkrethink.com LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/annadonagheyInstagram: instagram.com/bigdrinkrethinkProduced by winteraudio.co.uk
- 1 weeks ago54 min
Ep 140: The Craving Isn't The Enemy | Rethinking Alcohol |
What if the craving you feel for a drink is actually a craving for relief, regulation, or connection, and there’s another, more healing way to get it? In this episode, your host Anna Donaghey is joined by breathwork practitioner Jon Paul Crimi, whose powerful personal story weaves together addiction, grief, emotional numbness, and a breathwork experience that profoundly shifted his life. They discuss why most people reach for alcohol (it isn’t what you think), how drinking becomes our “solution” for regulating uncomfortable emotions, and the striking similarities between addiction and the universal longing for a shift in state. Jon Paul breaks down what breathwork really is (spoiler: it’s not just box breathing!) and shares how circular, connected breathwork specifically offers a physiological and emotional “reboot” making space for release, self-connection, and even joy. Anna shares her first-hand experience with his class, highlighting how breathwork can offer real, lasting relief that alcohol promises but can’t deliver.Whether you’re sober-curious, in recovery, or just looking to break free from unhelpful patterns and cravings, this conversation points to practical, science-backed ways to rethink your drinking.Highlights: 00:00 Welcome & intro to breathwork 01:01 Jon Paul’s story: addiction, loss, and seeking relief 04:13 When drinking goes from fun to just problems 07:29 The emotional “arrest” that comes from early drinking 08:25 Grief, trauma, and the search for tools 11:05 Why our brains equate alcohol with relief 14:15 What finally made sobriety stick 19:26 How breathwork entered Jon Paul’s life 12 years into sobriety 22:44 The first breathwork class: from scepticism to transformation 28:01 How breathwork helps regulate cravings, states, and emotions 30:17 Craving isn’t the enemy, it’s information 34:10 Breathwork vs. psychedelics: power inside YOU 35:48 What actually happens in a circular breathwork class 39:00 “Turning off your brain” and moving into your heart 46:08 Using breathwork for current and past pain, grief, and shame 52:16 Cravings, choices, and living an extraordinary life.Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/The Thirsty For More Mindset Lab is Anna’s ‘inner circle’ - a calm, thoughtful space where conversations continue, patterns are explored, and things begin to make sense. Find out more at: https://thirstyformore.substack.com/If you appreciate the podcast and would like to show a bit of love, you can donate the cost of a coffee here. It helps support the time and care that goes into making the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/bigdrinkrethinkAbout the host Anna:Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.Connect with Anna:Website: thebigdrinkrethink.com LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/annadonagheyInstagram: instagram.com/bigdrinkrethinkProduced by winteraudio.co.ukAbout Jon Paul Crimi:</
- 2 weeks ago26 min
Ep 139: Toolkit 101 – How To Identify Your Drinking Beliefs | Alcohol Coaching |
What if your drinking is driven less by choice and more by invisible beliefs running beneath the surface? In this solo episode, Anna Donaghey breaks down how beliefs act as our “operating system,” quietly driving our thoughts and behaviours, especially around alcohol. Anna reveals why it’s so difficult to spot the beliefs shaping our drinking, how to distinguish between a thought and a belief, and why simply changing behaviour rarely works unless you dig deeper. With practical examples and the “reverse chain” technique (starting with your behaviour and working backwards), Anna offers clear tools, including the powerful “downward arrow” method to help you uncover the beliefs at the root of your drinking habits and gently rethink your relationship with alcohol.Highlights: 00:00 Welcome & intro 00:41 Recap: The belief “pyramid” and last solo episode 01:20 Why beliefs matter more than thoughts or behaviours 03:10 The difference between a thought and a belief 05:07 Real-world examples: how beliefs quietly shape our actions 12:18 “Alcohol, please help me...”, the jobs we hand to booze 13:38 How habits and beliefs wire together neurologically 14:44 Aaron Beck’s model: core beliefs vs. automatic thoughts 15:35 Why starting with your behaviour is the key to spotting beliefs 16:14 Step-by-step: working backwards from behaviour to belief 24:23 Free guide to run this process anytime 25:30 New episodes: breaking down the most common alcohol beliefs 26:14 Where to find helpful resources. For the worksheet referred to in the episode, visit the toolkit full of free resources on Anna’s website thebigdrinkrethink.com, and download ‘How to Identify Your Drinking Beliefs’ Listen to Episode 137: The Beliefs Driving Your Drinking | Rethinking Alcohol, where Anna shares about the “Pyramid of Belief" and how deeply rooted feelings of “not enough” shape much of our behaviour, including our drinking habits.Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/The Thirsty For More Mindset Lab is Anna’s ‘inner circle’ - a calm, thoughtful space where conversations continue, patterns are explored, and things begin to make sense. Find out more at: https://thirstyformore.substack.com/If you appreciate the podcast and would like to show a bit of love, you can donate the cost of a coffee here. It helps support the time and care that goes into making the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/bigdrinkrethinkAbout the host Anna:Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.Connect with Anna:Website: thebigdrinkrethink.com LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/annadonagheyInstagram: instagram.com/bigdrinkrethinkProduced by <a href="http://winteraudio.co.uk" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_
- 3 weeks ago50 min
Ep 138: Pain Pushes Until Vision Pulls | Rethinking Alcohol |
What if the life you’re chasing, and the drinking that comes with it, are both keeping you from the life you really want?In this honest conversation, Anna Donaghey welcomes recovery and transition coach Alina Roselli, who shares her journey from living “outside-in” - seeking validation, people-pleasing and pushing through burnout, to soul-led sobriety and deep self-acceptance.Together, they explore why we can lose ourselves trying to meet other people’s expectations, how burnout and exhaustion can force us to question the life we’re living, and why transformation isn’t simply about giving up alcohol, it's about discovering who you are without it.They also explore self-worth, radical honesty, the trap of external validation and practical ways to start living more “inside-out”.For anyone questioning their relationship with alcohol, their sense of purpose, or whether there could be more to life, this episode offers an invitation to stop chasing approval and start coming home to yourself.Highlights:00:00 Welcome & introduction to Alina Roselli00:40 Alina’s unraveling, burnout, alcohol and not knowing herself02:46 The culture of drinking and starting at 1505:55 Seeking belonging and landing in “image-driven” circles10:07 What is “outside-in” living and how it shaped Alina’s self worth12:28 When alcohol shifts from fun to medicine15:46 How self-image creates our lives (and can keep us lost)16:43 Burnout as a wake-up call17:40 Trying everything (yoga, therapy, self-help) but not getting better23:27 Filling the “God-shaped hole” - how misaligned living leaves us empty26:04 Making hard changes and letting go of old identities28:46 Why inside-out living is terrifying and ultimately liberating30:10 “Pain pushes until the vision pulls”: learning to listen to your soul32:43 Finding calm, silence, and the right conditions to truly meet yourself34:19 Discovering introversion, the need for solitude, and creative renewal36:29 How the small actions revealed a bigger self and a life worth keeping39:32 How to reconnect with your needs and stop abandoning yourself41:36 The courage in honesty and the gifts waiting in the unknown43:42 Acceptance, creativity, and the joy of simply feeling okay46:35 Becoming yourself changes the world around you49:33 People have no idea how amazing they are50:19 How to join The Big Drink Rethink community.Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/The Thirsty For More Mindset Lab is Anna’s ‘inner circle’ - a calm, thoughtful space where conversations continue, patterns are explored, and things begin to make sense. Find out more at: https://thirstyformore.substack.com/If you appreciate the podcast and would like to show a bit of love, you can donate the cost of a coffee here. It helps support the time and care that goes into making the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/bigdrinkrethinkAbout the host Anna:Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.Connect with Anna:Website: thebigdrinkrethink.com LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/annadonagheyInstagram: instagram.com/bigdrinkrethink</u
- Aug 20, 202620 min
Ep 137: The Beliefs Driving Your Drinking | Rethinking Alcohol |
What if your drinking habits aren’t really about alcohol at all, but about the quiet, powerful beliefs sitting beneath the surface? In this solo episode, Anna Donaghey dives into the “Pyramid of Belief”, a simple framework that explains how deeply-rooted feelings of “not enough” shape much of our behaviour, including drinking.Using lived experience and insights from Dave Gray’s "Liminal Thinking," Anna breaks down how our early experiences, the culture we grow up in, and the swirl of online comparison, all reinforce beliefs like “I’m not smart enough,” “I’m not interesting enough,” and “I’m not enough, full stop.” She explores why alcohol so often becomes the go-to answer for the emotional discomfort those beliefs trigger and guides listeners through the first, vital steps to uncovering what they’re really thirsty for.Highlights:00:00 Welcome & intro00:40 The "not enough" beliefs we rarely examine01:13 Why this episode isn’t (really) about alcohol at first02:14 What is the Pyramid of Belief05:04 How our minds filter reality05:57 How a single shame-triggering moment forms a core belief09:03 Why you’re not flawed and how “not enough” beliefs got there10:30 Anna Donaghey’s own formative “not smart enough” moment13:39 The modern "comparison machine"14:20 How alcohol soothes the “not enough” wound16:15 Key question: “What is my drinking actually trying to answer for me?”16:27 Find your own “I’m not enough” belief17:47 What “I need...” before a drink reveals about your core beliefs17:59 Why pinning down beliefs (not just thoughts) is tricky18:42 Announcing a series exploring specific “not enough” beliefs19:37 None of this is your fault20:23 Resources & how to join The Big Drink Rethink community.Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/The Thirsty For More Mindset Lab is Anna’s ‘inner circle’ - a calm, thoughtful space where conversations continue, patterns are explored, and things begin to make sense. Find out more at: https://thirstyformore.substack.com/If you appreciate the podcast and would like to show a bit of love, you can donate the cost of a coffee here. It helps support the time and care that goes into making the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/bigdrinkrethinkAbout the host Anna:Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.Connect with Anna:Website: thebigdrinkrethink.com LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/annadonagheyInstagram: instagram.com/bigdrinkrethinkProduced by winteraudio.co.uk
- Aug 13, 202659 min
Ep 136: The Alcohol - ADHD Connection | Rethinking Alcohol |
Why does alcohol seem to have a different, more intense pull for some people - and could undiagnosed ADHD be the missing piece of the puzzle? In this episode, Anna Donaghey is joined by Matt Wing, a midlife mentor who spent over 30 years in a cycle of high achievement and high-functioning drinking, before a late ADHD diagnosis reframed everything.Together, they explore the misunderstood relationship between ADHD and alcohol use, bust the myth that it’s a simple willpower problem, and break down the real, neurological drivers behind compulsive drinking.Highlights:00:00 Intro: Meet Matt Wing, midlife mentor, exploring ADHD and alcohol01:13 Decades of "normal" drinking and the invisible exhaustion under it04:45 Compulsive self-fixing, failed solutions, and obsessive searching06:12 The pink book, ADHD traits, and why self-help didn't always land10:21 ADHD as a chronic dopamine deficit11:08 Instant dopamine hits: why nothing's enough12:44 Why attempts to cut down usually fail: it's not a "willpower" issue15:03 Alcohol's social acceptance hides its true addictiveness18:02 ADHD drinking: urgency, intensity, and chasing the unattainable23:19 Why 4pm is the real problem, not "having a drink problem"24:16 Racing head syndrome: alcohol as the only "off switch" that works29:19 Hyperfocus, the evening crash, and alcohol as relief not reward31:13 Rejection sensitivity and rejection-sensitive dysphoria in ADHD33:28 Why social drinking feels so necessary (and so hard to quit)34:38 "Time blindness": why the ADHD brain struggles with "forever”43:04 The missed ADHD generation: making sense of the past46:22 New ways to soothe the nervous system51:40 Growth mindset: you're not stuck, and social skills can be learned53:37 ADHD as a superpower if you channel it right56:40 Where to find Matt Wing and resources to get support.Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/The Thirsty For More Mindset Lab is Anna’s ‘inner circle’ - a calm, thoughtful space where conversations continue, patterns are explored, and things begin to make sense. Find out more at: https://thirstyformore.substack.com/If you appreciate the podcast and would like to show a bit of love, you can donate the cost of a coffee here. It helps support the time and care that goes into making the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/bigdrinkrethinkAbout the host Anna:Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.Connect with Anna:Website: thebigdrinkrethink.comLinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/annadonagheyInstagram: instagram.com/bigdrinkrethinkProduced by winteraudio.co.ukAbout Matt Wing:Matt Wing is the founder of Midlife Mentor, a coaching and content brand for midlife adults who want to change their relationship with alcohol without calling themselves an alcoholic or sitting in a recovery group. He's the creator of the 4PM Reset Method, built around the idea that most people
- Aug 6, 202656 min
Ep 135: What Have You Got To Be Unhappy About? | Rethinking Alcohol
Why do high-flying CEOs, investors, and ultra-successful leaders, people with every resource at their fingertips, still end up stuck, lonely, and reaching for a drink?In this episode, Anna Donaghey is joined by Lindsey Frances, a leadership psychologist and longtime AA member who has seen alcohol up close from both the boardroom and the AA room. Together they unpack the universal experience of feeling trapped by drink, the myth that outer success delivers inner fulfilment, and why human suffering pays no attention to your bank balance.Is the pull to drink really about stress, status, or socialising, or is it something deeper: unmet needs for purpose, connection, and calm? As Lindsey and Anna discover, real change starts with a single question: what are you truly thirsty for?Highlights:00:00 Intro: High achievers & high-functioning alcohol use02:03 What boardrooms and AA rooms have in common05:15 The trap: shame, disconnection, and feeling unworthy06:09 Why suffering feels the same in £1000 shoes or 99p flip-flops09:36 Success as an external “cage”; failing on the inside12:14 Coping at the top: alcohol and other numbing strategies13:32 Addiction is disconnection, so what comes first?15:13 Alcohol as a (false) shortcut to connection and significance17:06 What are people really thirsty for? Purpose, enough-ness, & joy22:30 Why high achievers can’t just “stop”26:12 Sophrology and imagining a life beyond work (and drinking)30:27 What does constant “fight or flight” feel like?36:31 Why you can’t biohack your way out of pain 40:08 Universal issues, whether you run hedge funds or trim hedges45:08 Simple, accessible tools for regulating your nervous system48:01 “Simple, but not easy”: choosing your hard49:20 Lindsey’s own journey - making sense of emotions after quitting54:09 Andrew Lloyd Webber’s story: why sobriety trumps career success54:55 Serving others, and the real sources of flourishing55:23 Where to find Lindsey Frances and resources for sophrologyAnna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/The Thirsty For More Mindset Lab is Anna’s ‘inner circle’ - a calm, thoughtful space where conversations continue, patterns are explored, and things begin to make sense. Find out more at: https://thirstyformore.substack.com/If you appreciate the podcast and would like to show a bit of love, you can donate the cost of a coffee here. It helps support the time and care that goes into making the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/bigdrinkrethinkAbout the host Anna:Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.Connect with Anna:Website: thebigdrinkrethink.com LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/annadonagheyInstagram: instagram.com/bigdrinkrethinkProduced by winteraudio.co.ukAbout Lindsey Frances:Lindsey Frances is a clinical sophrologist, legacy and wealth psychologist, preventative health expert and data-led performance coach, hel
- Jul 30, 202612 min
Ep 134: Drowning in Data But Starved of Insight | Rethinking Alcohol
What if all the sleep scores, step counts, and readiness reports in the world still leave you missing the point? In this solo episode, Anna Donaghey unpacks the paradox of our “self-quantified” age: we collect endless data about our bodies, yet remain confused about why we reach for that Friday night drink.Why do so many of us meticulously track our health and download optimisation apps, but still pour a glass (or two) at the end of the week even though the data says it’s a bad idea? Anna explains why metrics alone can’t change behaviour and why the real question isn’t “What does the data show?” but “What are you truly thirsty for?”Highlights:00:00 Intro: Obsessed by health data but still drinking?00:44 The archetype: data-obsessive, wine-on-Friday person02:04 We’re more quantified, and less self-aware, than ever03:21 Data isn’t enough to change behaviour05:30 We’ve stopped asking about causes and focus on numbers instead06:53 The wine and wellness routines: same job, different means07:33 Understanding your body is useful but it’s only the doorway08:23 The answer is found in your life, not your data09:45 The core unmet needs that drive drinking10:06 Meeting your deeper needs transforms your relationship with alcohol10:44 The real question: what is this drink telling me about my life?11:29 Next week: Lindsey Frances using data as the start, not the end, of self-discovery12:11 The question to sit with: not your sleep score but what are you thirsty for?Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/The Thirsty For More Mindset Lab is Anna’s ‘inner circle’ - a calm, thoughtful space where conversations continue, patterns are explored, and things begin to make sense. Find out more at: https://thirstyformore.substack.com/If you appreciate the podcast and would like to show a bit of love, you can donate the cost of a coffee here. It helps support the time and care that goes into making the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/bigdrinkrethinkAbout the host Anna:Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.Connect with Anna:Website: thebigdrinkrethink.com LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/annadonagheyInstagram: instagram.com/bigdrinkrethinkProduced by winteraudio.co.uk
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About The Big Drink Rethink
Anna explores our shifting drinking culture by talking to the people rethinking and reshaping it. With the trademark lightness and non-judgement that define her as an Alcohol Mindset Coach, she invites us to consider our own perspectives, as she shares the knowledge, insights and tools that can help us make our own good, healthy life choices.
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