Is It Really "Behavior"? Medical Issues We May Miss in Autistic & ADHD Kids

What if the "behavior" you're seeing isn't simply behavior? When an autistic or ADHD child suddenly becomes more irritable, anxious, withdrawn, aggressive, avoidant, or emotionally dysregulated, it's easy to focus on what we can see—and how to make it stop. But what if the behavior is actually a clue? In this episode of The Autism ADHD Podcast, I'm joined by my dear friend Dr. Purnima Valdez, a developmental-behavioral pediatrician and Associate Professor in the Department of Pediatrics at Duke University Medical Center. Together, we explore medical, emotional, and environmental factors that may contribute to changes in behavior in autistic and ADHD children and teens—and why some of these concerns can be surprisingly easy to miss. Because even a child who speaks fluently may not be able to recognize, interpret, or communicate: "Something doesn't feel right in my body." Instead, we may see irritability, anxiety, withdrawal, aggression, avoidance, emotional dysregulation, or other changes in behavior. And that's where curiosity becomes incredibly important. In this episode, we talk about: • Why behavior can be important information—not an explanation • Sleep difficulties, fractured sleep, snoring, and sleep apnea • How poor sleep can affect behavior and emotional regulation • Headaches and migraines in neurodivergent children and teens • Constipation, GI discomfort, and changes in behavior • Interoception and difficulty recognizing or communicating what's happening inside the body • Medication side effects—including side effects that may appear after a child has taken a medication for some time • Eating, nutrition, safe foods, and restrictive eating patterns • Anxiety, sensory overwhelm, school demands, and environmental stress • Why "they're just trying to get out of class" may be the wrong conclusion • How assumptions about behavior can unintentionally add shame to an already struggling child • Why looking for patterns can help us better understand what a child may be experiencing • When parents may want to involve their child's pediatrician or other healthcare professionals • Why collaboration between parents, therapists, educators, medical professionals, and the child or teen matters One of my favorite perspective shifts from this conversation is simple: Maybe our expectation is off. We often expect children to tell us exactly what's wrong. "My stomach hurts." "I have a headache." "I didn't sleep well." "Something feels different." But autistic and ADHD children may experience, recognize, and communicate what's happening inside their bodies differently. That doesn't mean they aren't communicating. We may need to get better at recognizing how they're telling us. And when a child is struggling, instead of immediately asking: "How do we stop this behavior?" we can become curious and ask: "What might be happening that we haven't understood yet?" This episode is especially important for parents of autistic and ADHD children, therapists, counselors, psychologists, educators, and other professionals supporting neurodivergent kids and teens. Please share it with someone who needs this reminder: sometimes the behavior we're trying to change may be one of the most important clues we have. FOR THERAPISTS, COUNSELORS & PSYCHOLOGISTS Want to deepen your neurodiversity-affirming work with autistic and ADHD children and teens? I've created continuing education trainings specifically for mental health professionals who want practical, neurodiversity-affirming strategies they can use in their clinical work. Learn more about my continuing education trainings: hollyblancmoses.com/cetraining DOES YOUR CHILD OR CLIENT NEED HELP AT SCHOOL? You'll love the 135 School Accommodations for Autistic & ADHD Students Guide! The guide includes practical, neurodiversity-affirming supports for executive functioning, academics, sensory needs, emotional regulation, social support, self-advocacy, and more, with examples of each accommodation. PLUS - 3 student examples Parents, click here for the Guide Therapists, click here for the Guide JOIN MY FACEBOOK GROUPS Parents click here Therapists click here Learn about my private practice - <a href= "https://ww