The ADHD Channel for Women

When intense feels normal: ADHD and abusive relationships | Sorry, I Missed This

October 8, 2026·28 min
Episode Description from the Publisher

Research shows that girls with ADHD are significantly more likely to experience intimate partner violence.Dr. Emily Rothman, who recently published a study on dating violence in neurodivergent youth, joins Cate to talk about what the research actually shows.They discuss why ADHD symptoms might make it harder to recognize abuse. They also cover how to tell ordinary relationship conflict from patterns of coercive control.Cate and Emily talk openly about why leaving is rarely a single decision, and how to support a friend or family member who’s trying to get out. They also get into the uncomfortable fact that there are higher rates of ADHD among abuse perpetrators.This episode discusses domestic violence, coercive control, and sexual abuse. If you or someone you know needs support:National Domestic Violence Hotline (24/7): 1-800-799-7233RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673Love Is Respect (dating abuse), call or text: 1-866-331-9474For more on this topic Watch: ADHD, toxic partners, and “losing your sparkle” (Reddit Reactions)Watch: ADHD gaslighting and chasing new relationship energy (Reddit Reactions) | Sorry, I Missed ThisWatch: ADHD impulsivity and saying yes to sex too fast| Sorry, I Missed ThisFor a transcript and more resources, visit Sorry, I Missed This on Understood.org. You can also email us at podcast@understood.org. Getting your child the support they need at school shouldn’t feel like a fight. But for millions of families, it does. In Zero Reject, an investigative podcast from Understood.org, award-winning journalist Anya Kamenetz looks at how changing federal policies are reshaping special education — and what’s at stake for families trying to access the support their children are legally entitled to. Start listening now.Understood is a nonprofit where millions of people who are navigating neurodivergence find clear guidance, practical tools, and people who get it. To help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/podcast-donate. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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