Giving Up Control with Marc Kaye

In this snack-sized follow-up with host Ophira Eisenberg, comedian and author Marc Kaye digs into the split between fitting in and belonging that gives his essay collection its spine, admitting he's spent a lifetime chasing the former while quietly resenting how much it costs him, a distinction he says reframed the whole book once he stopped blaming other people for his own discomfort. The conversation turns most vivid around "Chance of Showers," the essay Mark almost cut from the manuscript because writing it forced him to relive the five-hour drive dropping his son Elliot off at college in Pittsburgh, where he realized the grief wasn't really about the empty bedroom. It was about his own unlived dreams, the ones he'd been shoving, as his girlfriend puts it, under "the lumpy rug." He walks through the advice he actually gave Elliot before move-in (make the kind of mistakes that become funny stories at 40, not the kind you carry as regret) and his own unfulfilled curiosity about a guided psilocybin retreat, name-checking Michael Pollan's "How to Change Your Mind" and the documentary "Fantastic Fungi" while making clear he wants a real facilitator, not "somebody hanging on South Street." He also traces the origin of his comedy album title, "I'm a Good Dad," back to a running joke with his kids after his own less-than-proud parenting moments, including the story he tells to close the episode, about buying his son a bulk box of Costco condoms before college, only to find it ripped open "like a monkey" on a closet shelf a year later while his own unsuspecting father stood right next to him. 📍September Shows are in Toronto, Canada, Cleveland & Cincinnati, Ohio, St. Louis, MO, Saint Paul, MN, NYC Follow Marc Kaye : https://www.instagram.com/awkwardlymarc Buy his book: A Is For Awkward https://www.marckayetoday.com/a-is-for-awkward See Ophira LIVE: https://www.ophiraeisenberg.com/events/ Check out my NEW Comedy Special “I Used to Be Nicer” is AVAILABLE on Amazon, Google Play and Apple!https://www.ophiraeisenberg.com Listen to it as an Album: https://open.spotify.com/album/1rHqPoBYc78gzMnCrCFoZy SUBSCRIBE so you never miss O thing: https://www.ophiraeisenberg.com/sign-up Follow PIAJ:  https://www.instagram.com/parentingisajoke/ https://parentingisajoke.substack.com/   Follow Ophira: https://www.instagram.com/ophirae/ https://www.facebook.com/OphiraEisenberg/ https://www.tiktok.com/@ophiranyc Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices