LOVERS by Shan

He Cheated. Then He Had a Son. Here's What He Did Differently

June 3, 2026·1h 13m
Episode Description from the Publisher

Sex Is a Skill. Beducated is where you learn it. Join Beducated today at https://beducate.me/loversbyshan.  Big love to the sponsor of this episode, CozyEarth! Head to https://cozyearth.com/LOVERS and use my code LOVERS for an exclusive 20% off. Head to www.penguinrandomhouse.com to get your copy of Caro Claire Burke’s new book Yesteryear, a gripping, darkly funny thriller about an influencer trapped in a nightmare version of the past. —----- Dondré Whitfield on why men cheat — and what nobody taught them about love. Dondré Whitfield is an actor best known for his roles in Guiding Light, Queen Sugar, and The Game, and the author of Male vs. Man (a book about what it actually means to be a man in the context of family, fatherhood, and love). In this conversation, he traces the origin of his infidelity not to a moment of weakness but to a moment of watching his father lust after other women in plain sight (that was the day, he says, the cheater in him was born — not because he wanted to be that man, but because he didn't yet know he had a choice). What follows is one of the most specific and honest conversations we've had on this show about what it looks like when a man finally decides to understand himself and then builds an entire framework so his children don't have to start from zero. His concept, "we date as a family" (where the whole family meets not just the person a child is dating but their father too, so everyone can help scaffold the relationship toward something healthy), is practical, radical, and worth hearing in full. Follow Dondré Whitfield Instagram → https://www.instagram.com/alldondre/ Website → https://www.dondrewhitfield.com/ Get Dondré's book Male vs. Man → https://a.co/d/0het8rPc Want more Lover? Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com  Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter  Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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