Let's Talk About Religious Trauma: Honoring the Journey of Vernique Esther

This conversation with Vernique Esther went so many places, and I loved every minute of it! Vernique grew up in a beautiful and sometimes chaotic mix of denominations, cultures, and ideas about God, shaped by her Haitian and West African roots. Her journey eventually led her into a legalistic campus ministry that she now describes as “culty,” an early marriage that ended in devastating infidelity and divorce, and the political upheaval of 2016 that caused the cracks in her faith to break wide open. We talked about purity culture, patriarchal church systems, and the impossible burden so many women were taught to carry—the idea that we were somehow the “moral vessels” responsible for holding everything together. We were expected to suffer well, forgive endlessly, stay faithful, remain quiet, and somehow keep everyone else from falling apart, even when we were the ones being deeply harmed.Today, Vernique describes her faith as a Jesus-centered, non-religious spirituality. We had such an honest conversation about separating the character of Jesus from some of the violent and troubling portrayals of God we encounter elsewhere in Scripture, and what it looks like to keep following Jesus after so much of the religious framework around him has fallen away.Vernique also shared her powerful concept of “trauma languages”—the patterns our pain can create in relationships, including control and rejection sensitivity—and opened up about who holds space for her while she continues doing her own healing.Find out more about Vernique here: www.verniqueesther.com Honoring the Journey is hosted, produced and edited by Leslie Nease. To help her keep these stories coming and fund the podcast expenses, you can donate here.Pick up Leslie's book, Honoring the Journey: The Deconstruction of Sister Christian here.Interested in working with Leslie as your Spiritual Director or Life/Faith Transitions Coach? Check out her website and learn more about what she offers! https://www.leslieneasecoaching.comIf you'd like to be a part of the Honoring the Journey Team on Substack, click here! You can find her work and also support her financially if you desire.Would you like to leave a voicemail for Leslie? Click here! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.