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Every Damn Magic Card!: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Machine Culture
Four mana dorks have been cursed by fate to walk this plane until they've deciphered EVERY DAMN MAGIC CARD! Join Brandon, Meadow, Jesse and George as they invite a beloved guest to chat about their favorite Magic card, and help them reach the bottom of the library one card at a time.
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- Yesterday1h 9m
Flubs, the Fool
We're talking about the cards today, not just Magic cards but also the Tarot! The Every Damn Magic Card mana dorks Brandon, Meadow, July (formerly George) and Jesse get into a discussion on our favorite bi king Flubs, the Fool that ends up in many odd places (much like his tongue). Talking points include 90s animated pizza, cursed tarot decks and a lot of Rider–Waite jokes. Scales used in this episode include:The James Dobson Scale (how satanic is this card?)The Cowabummer Scale (How sad will it be to see this card next to a TMNT card?)The Wood Scale (How much would you... you know ;) )and a bonus round of "Help, I've been hit by a truck and I've been reincarnated as a 90s mall employee!"
- 2 weeks ago1h 14m
Undercover Butler
Spooky scary! It's the first ever Every Damn Magic Card Halloween spectacular talking about the Magic card Undercover Butler. Join the mana dorks Brandon, July, Meadow and Jesse as they are visited by a very special guest, an actual g-g-ghost! Highlights include rattling chains, the sounds of midnight phantoms and the most scary thing you can imagine: Tim Curry in the Worst Witch. Anything can happen on Halloween! Scales used in this episode include:The James Dobson Scale (how satanic is this card?)The Spooky Scare(Scale) (How spooky is this card?)The Curry Scale (How spicy and/or Tim Curry is this card?)
- 4 weeks ago1h 6m
Stargaze
It's time to gaze at those stars! The Every Damn Magic Card Mana Dorks/Sluts George, Brandon and Jesse go on a magical adventure with Meadow to talk about the Magic Card Stargaze. She gets into George and Brandon's star charts while taking the Mana Dorks on a new game show journey all related to astrology. This was such a fun episode even with Brandon having a mental breakdown from googling so poorly. A for Drift!Scales used in this episode include:The James Dobson Scale (how satanic is this card?)The Vibes Scale (How are we vibin' with this card?) This card has been entered into the Stargaze club!The DM(X) Scale (How well does this card use the X amount?)
- Sep 25, 20261h 12m
OMRSTPLRLCNSWMTCTHTALCNEE
Folks, we did it. It's the most silly episode of Every Damn Magic Card yet because we're talking about the unhinged Magic card "Our Market Research Shows That Players Like Really Long Card Names So We Made this Card to Have the Absolute Longest Card Name Ever Elemental" (yes, this is the actual name of the card). The mana dorks Jesse, Meadow and George had on special guest Martin Felshman to really dissect the card OMRSTPLRLCNSWMTCTHTALCNEE (for shorthand) to see what makes it tick and just what it's got swinging. Once again: this is a silly one. We're going to play Roblox with you mentally.Scales used in this episode include:The James Dobson Scale (how satanic is this card?)The Un-Scale (How silly is this card?)The Johnny Scale (How many weird combos and ways can you break this card?)
- Sep 11, 20261h 5m
Vizzerdrix
Welcome, one and all, to our first ever after dark episode of Every Damn Magic Card because things got very sexy with our discussion of the card Vizzerdrix. We had on special guest Cameron Little with the mana dorks/sluts Meadow, Jesse and Brandon to really get into what makes this pink bunny tick with some very esoteric references to Iggy Pop. Now you're thinking with 8s! Scales used in this episode include:The Wood Scale (How much would you... you know ;) )The James Dobson Scale (how satanic is this card?)The Cowabummer Scale (How sad will it be to see this card next to a TMNT card?)
- Aug 28, 20261h 6m
Eight-and-a-Half-Tails
It's our eighth episode of the Every Damn Magic Card podcast so George, Jesse, Meadow and Brandon absolutely must talk about the Magic card Eight-and-a-Half-Tails. This was Brandon's first commander so the gang talks about their own first commanders as well as big, sinful dirtbikes and what job Magic characters would have inside a mall. It'll all make sense after you listen, folks! Scales used in this episode include:The Fallen Empires Scale (How well has a famously bad set aged?)The James Dobson Scale (how satanic is this card?)The Suncoast Video Aesthetic Scale (How much does this card embrace the Suncoast Video Aesthetic?)
- Aug 14, 20261h 4m
Arcane Bombardment
Great news: If you want your bombardments to be arcanic, this is the Every Damn Magic Card episode for YOU! Special guests and Chicago comedian Zach Boyce joins the Mana dorks/sluts George, Jesse and Brandon to talk about the Magic card Arcane Bombardment. We really get into some deep talks on role playing games, smoking out problematic children's books and supporting women's wrongs.Scales used in this episode include:The James Dobson Scale (how satanic is this card?)The Cowabummer Scale (How sad will it be to see this card next to a TMNT card?)The Kino Scale (How cinematic is this card?)
- Jul 31, 202655 min
Hide//Seek
Hey there! Vi Conraad of BaddieVilles Got Talent and Jake Avorio of being an Onion Knight join the Mana dorks/sluts George and Meadow to talk about the Magic Card Hide//Seek and let me tell you, it GETS wacky. Some fun discussions on this episode involve wet pals, pondering orbs and positive ape indexes. We also introduce the coveted golden urinal award!Scales used in this episode include:The James Dobson Scale (how satanic is this card?)The Twotility scale (how good are both sides of this card for play?)The ACAB scale (how much is this card a cop? This scored a 5 all around and has been given the golden urinal award)
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About Every Damn Magic Card!
Four mana dorks have been cursed by fate to walk this plane until they've deciphered EVERY DAMN MAGIC CARD! Join Brandon, Meadow, Jesse and George as they invite a beloved guest to chat about their favorite Magic card, and help them reach the bottom of the library one card at a time.
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