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by Timber Hawkeye
The intention is to awaken, enlighten, enrich, and inspire. Timber Hawkeye is the bestselling author of Buddhist Boot Camp, Faithfully Religionless, and the Opposite of Namaste. He offers a secular approach to being at peace with the world, both within and around us. As the Dalai Lama says, "Don't try to use what you learn from Buddhism to be a Buddhist, use it to be a better whatever-you-already-are."
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Our reactions to life's ups and downs are so disproportionate, we create our own anguish and then blame other people for it. True mastery starts when we recognize that WE are the problem. If other people easily upset you, the problem isn't other people, it's your short fuse. May no-one and no-thing ever disturb your inner-peace.
This is how I personally cope with general anxiety and dismiss intrusive thoughts.
The difference between Sharing and Complaining, Supporting and Enabling, and how we can maintain a calm composure and peace of mind while listening to other people grumbling about one thing or another.
If you wait until you "feel ready" to make some changes in your life, you'll be waiting forever because "ready" is not a feeling, it's a decision. The way to embrace change instead of resisting it, even though we are wired to avoid what is different, is to stop thinking of change as scary or dangerous, and start getting excited about it (because change is going to happen whether you are ready or not).
Our need to belong is natural, healthy, and necessary, but the craving for acceptance is egocentric, fragile, and unstable. That's why many of us feel stuck between wanting connection, but resenting social convention pressuring us to conform in order to belong. The Buddha's realization was that he wasn't even separate from the tree under which he was meditating; they were one. We all are. My invitation is for us to bring that level of awareness into every interaction, and to see everyone and everything as an extension of ourselves. You don't need to "prove your worth," and you certainly don't need to pretend to be something you are not in order to belong. If you find value in these videos, please show your support at https://www.buddhistbootcamp.com/support — Thank you for being a Soldier of Peace in the Army of Love.
The more consistently you take ownership of your inner world, the less you try to outsource your well-being. It starts by noticing how often you blame something or someone else for your misery, and you might also see how dependent you've become on something or someone else for your happiness. The peace we are chasing is not "out there" somewhere, it is patiently waiting for us to come back to ourselves and reclaim it from within.
We are all taught a language, but we are not taught how to communicate, which is the reason for so many arguments and misunderstandings. When the Buddha spoke of Mindful Speech, it wasn't just about avoiding gossip and verbal abuse. Mindful Speech is also about purposeful and meaningful communication. Words can be useless and lack meaning, or they can be rich and offer healing. In a world where it costs absolutely nothing to transform casual interactions into meaningful connections, there is no reason for dismissive, vague, or entitled comments between us. So, let's lead by example in our conversations, and be as truthful, sincere, and articulate as possible to make meaningful connections the new norm.
Trying to control someone is not the same as loving or caring for them. True compassion respects autonomy; it does not try to engineer outcomes. So, do not exhaust yourself trying to change what is not yours to fix. Peace comes from accepting what is, keeping in mind that acceptance does not mean approval, it simply means recognizing what is within our control, and gently releasing what is not.
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The intention is to awaken, enlighten, enrich, and inspire. Timber Hawkeye is the bestselling author of Buddhist Boot Camp, Faithfully Religionless, and the Opposite of Namaste. He offers a secular approach to being at peace with the world, both within and around us. As the Dalai Lama says, "Don't try to use what you learn from Buddhism to be a Buddhist, use it to be a better whatever-you-already-are."
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