292: How Pornographic Content Harms Sexual Development | Dr. Tori Cordiano

Right now, a lot of families are thinking about how to talk with their kids — especially their sons — about consent and how sexual partners deserve to be treated. And if you find something graphic on your teen's screen, you face another challenging question: what is this actually teaching my teen, and is it already too late to do something about it? Here's what makes this conversation more important than ever: according to Common Sense Media, 73% of U.S. teens have seen online pornography by age 17 — boys and girls encounter it at nearly the same rate, but boys are considerably more likely to go looking for it on purpose, and most teens who do seek it out are watching at least weekly. This isn't a rare or fringe exposure. It's closer to a near-universal one, and repeated viewing can genuinely shape what a teen thinks sex, desire, and respect are supposed to look like, often before they've had much–if any–real-world experience to compare it to. Dr. Tori Cordiano leads us through why compulsive porn use in teens is so difficult to interrupt once it starts, why infinite-scroll content is built to exploit that wiring, and how ADHD and dopamine-seeking behavior intersect. We also explore how repeated exposure to graphic content can shape teen sexual development— and what that has to do with the values conversation so many families are having right now. This means you've got real levers to pull — setting clear device rules, treating ADHD if it’s present, and having short, calm conversations instead of one big awkward talk. Whether you're trying to stop a teen from watching porn altogether or just want to know what to do next, you don't have to solve this in one sit-down, and you don't have to do it alone. Dr. Lisa Damour is a clinical psychologist, New York Times bestselling author, and globally recognized expert on adolescent development who partners with UNICEF to support parents worldwide. Dr. Tori Cordiano is a licensed clinical psychologist, speaker, and writer specializing in child and adolescent development. In her private practice, she provides comprehensive evaluations, parent consultation, and psychotherapy, alongside a virtual course for parents on executive functioning and a regular newsletter. Dr. Cordiano also serves as a consulting psychologist and Co-Director of the Center for Research for Girls at Laurel School. This episode does not reference any specific news story or legal case. ________________  GET DR. DAMOUR'S FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER Guidance, strategies, and tips delivered straight to your inbox → ⁠⁠https://drlisadamour.com/sign-up-for-my-newsletter/⁠⁠  DR. DAMOUR'S BESTSELLING BOOKS - Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood – ⁠⁠https://bit.ly/UntangledBook⁠⁠ - Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls – ⁠⁠https://bit.ly/UnderPressuretheBook⁠⁠ - The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents – ⁠⁠https://a.co/d/cbOmTKp⁠⁠  UNTANGLING 10TO20 MEMBERSHIP Premium courses & resources for teens and the adults who care for them → ⁠⁠https://lnkd.in/gr52MB-F⁠⁠  VISIT DR. LISA'S WEBSITE → ⁠⁠https://drlisadamour.com/⁠⁠ ________________ Today's sponsors: Goodr: Get $10 off your first order at https://www.goodr.com/ASKLISA Jones Road Beauty:  Use the code ASKLISA for a free full sized Mascara with your first purchase at ⁠https://www.jonesroadbeauty.com⁠. Shopify: Sign up for your free trial today at ⁠https://www.shopify.com/asklisa⁠ Orion Sleep: Get 15% off your next purchase at ⁠https://www.OrionSleep.com/AskLisa ________________ Parenting a tween or teen? Buckle up. Ask Lisa: Untangling Family Life tackles the questions that keep parents up at night — academics, friendships, mental health, screens, meltdowns, and more. Every week, psychologist Lisa Damour teams up with a different expert to answer a real parent's real question — no fluff, no judgment, just practical, evidence-based advice you can actually use. Dr. Damour and her colleagues also turn their attention to the emotional rollercoaster of raising kids — the moments that leave you feeling uneasy, overwhelmed, or just plain alone. You don't have to have it all figured out. You just have to hit play. ________________ Episode keywords: teen porn addiction, teen pornography addiction, teen porn problem, child watching porn, teen watching porn, ADHD and porn, ADHD dopamine addiction, compulsive porn use teen, stop teen watching porn, teen internet addiction, teen screen addiction, son watching porn what to do, teen sexual development and porn, help for teen porn addiction, talking to your son about consent, how porn affects teen relationships, raising boys to respect women Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parentin